Power To Walk Down This Dark Road
by SymphonicMetalChocobos
Summary: It all started with Roxas, those looks. Xigbar didn't realize it, but he wanted something, something only Roxas could give him... or is it too late? All hell is going to come down on them: Secrets. Hate. Blood, Violence, Yaoi, XigRoku, LexZex, MarDem.
1. Beginning

Xigbar... thought he didn't need his heart anymore, that it wasn't... 'functional' anymore;That he didn't need it, and it didn't bother him anymore. It had been stolen, years and years ago, he knew this fact well enough, was faced with the effect every day, every moment. He grew accustomed to simulating the emotions in his brain, followed by expressing them. Not in words, that would only bring lectures and suspicions of his ignorance... or rather, some might say, stupidity, but rather in actions; Sadness and anger expressed with simple target pratice and happiness, or something remotely resembling of it, in hollow laughs that echoed off the walls. His lack of a heart stopped bothering him after a year. In the beginning, nearly ten years ago... the very start of when he found himself sans a heart and emotion, he had been confused and angry, lashing out recklessly, and sometimes he was bitter and guilty of his past actions. And after a while... he calmed down, followed by finding himself accepting what happened, then finally, it became nothing more than normality.

He would awaken, he might brush his hair somewhat, bother someone, go see Saix for a mission, do said mission, then end his day by drifting off into a dreamless slumber until he awoke the next day -not morning, there was so sun- and repeated the process; Just a simple, usual routine.

_Laughing, choking, smashing, waiting..._

_Finding something fascinating_

_Something lost, and something found_

_All you think might be unwound_

Today, that routine was broken like so many other days, routine slightly fractured by a meeting in the Round Room. Normally, he would have slept through it... Superior Xemnas never said anything of great importance, most of the time repeating himself over and over until even Saix grew impatient and exhausted by the ramblings. He doubted the meeting was important, but he didn't want to be repremanded for missing it.

Xigbar didn't do anything besides yawn as he sat up and swung his legs over the side of the.. well, it could barely be called a bed; It was more like a icy cold, uncorfortable metal cot than anything else, lacking blankets and what could be considered the worse pillow ever made. Unlike the other members, he slept without his cloak, only clothes in underwear and pants while his boots rested beside the cot, heel touching the lower left corner. He stood, breathing slowly as he grasped his coat and slipped one arm in, followed by the second, zipping it from the top down to below his waist; His boots came on with a lazy chuckle, letting it roll from his mouth without thinking. Another day, another mission, though today was slightly different. He opened a swirling black and purple portal, highlighted with a peculiar blue, stepping through so he ended up on his numberized chair, barely dropping a centimeter onto the white metall All the members were present, including Number XIII, a blond with the most.. beautiful hair that rivaled strings of spun gold. Normally, he wouldn't say such things, he wasn't... expressive of anything, almost always labeling it as 'awesome' or 'cool', not bothering with the details, but Roxas... Roxas was different.

"Salutations, friends," Superior Xemnas took a short pause, voice just barely echoing in the rightly named Round Room. He closed his amber orbs for a second, face resting on his gloved knuckles. "Kingdom Hearts is growing steadily. Number XIII and XIV are making great process with their...keyblades."

The word rolled off his tongue, hissing the 's' softly.

"But the main news for us... is that a new world has been revealed, and surely houses many Heartless for Kingdom Hearts..."

Xigbar sighed, no longer paying attention; So it was a new world... that just meant more work for them, which he didn't nessicarily want... but then again, there was nothing to do around the Castle besides poke fun at others, sit around, and sleep, so he might as well work. At least it was somewhere new, not the same old Twilight Town or Halloween Town... He tilted his head slightly, and Roxas' gaze of cerulean brightness crossed his, but the boy looked away; He figured Roxas had been looking at him for a short while, eyebrows raised. Sometimes... he found himself day-dreaming about the blond; Nothing disgusting or horrible, but.. he just found the boy... mezmerising almost. He simply couldn't explain it. They were decent friends, but Roxas was around Axel most of the time, so they couldn't always be talk unless they had a mission or Axel was gone, but lately... he had found Roxas staring at him; Dyring missions, meetings, or even in the Grey Room. Whenever his one-eyed gaze met those twin jewels, he suddenly felt better. It was like everything stressful or irritating just melted away; Even target pratice didn't make him... and he hated to say it, 'feel' better. He couldn't describe as anything but 'feel', at least to him.

By the time he had faded out of his trance, the meeting was over and all of the members had left. Great... not one of them even thought to 'wake him up'. Scoffing, he teleported himself to the Grey Room to receive his mission from Saix.

Xigbar appeared in outside the Grey Room on a silver and white platform, white, nearly trasperant stairs leading both up and down. Strolling inside, he took in the the room's view in for the thousandth time, simply because. A massive window to the north, Kingdom Hearts floating in the sky, a gray couch and coffee table on the left side of the room, and a coffee table and three chairs to the right, all resting on a floor mixed with gray, white, and blue lines, pulsing with that seemed like electricity. Oddly, the room was bright, despite outside being pitch black with only light from Kingdom Hearts and the many buildings below, and no source of light in the room.

"Yo, kiddo," Xigbar greeted Roxas with a wave and grin, one hand shoved in the pockets of his cloak as he leisurely walked up the tiny male, who turned, smiling.

"Hey Xigbar," Roxas was cheerful, waving back at Xigbar."We've got a mission together."

Xigbar's eyebrows quirked in slight suprise. He hadn't had a mission with Roxas for a while now. He stared into Roxas' eyes, and there was something... inside them. He thought it might have been emotion, since Roxas' expressed more emotion than nearly all of the Organization combinded, but he lacked a heart as well, so it was impossible.

"Cool, kiddo, where we goin'?" Xigbar questioned, smirking softly.

"That new world," Roxas stated."Saix said the world was called Fantasia. We're gonna explore it for our mission."

"Huh.. Well then, c'mon, tiger. Let's go." Xigbar exclaimed, opening a portal for the two, leting himself walk through first, before Roxas followed. He didn't want anything to attack Roxas.


	2. Mission

Xigbar groaned as his boots squished into the slimy mud that made for ground; now he had to clean those when he returned... He heard Roxas make a disgruntled noise and he looked back to see the teenage scowling.

"Sucks, huh?" Xigbar stated, summoning his guns in a flash of purple.

"Yeah..." Roxas trailed off as he sunk into the mud."We better start moving..."

"Guess we can report that Fantasia is muddy as hell." Xigbar gave a tiny, triumphant smirk as Roxas laughed at his remark; At least he made Roxas laugh a little, that was a decent start for a friendship. '_Heh, look at me, _he thought with a chuckle, _tryin' my hardest to get a friend... Lame_...' Subconsciously, he shook his head ay himself, scratching the nape of his neck. He looked around and was greeted by thick, jungle foliage; Plants with massive deep green leaves, and grass the color of the darkest cobalt, and towering trees whose many leaves masked the sky, leaving enough space for raindrops to filter through. If hadn't have been raining and obscenely muddy, Fantasia might have been a nice place...

"Where do we even start?" Roxas sighed, confused and slightly annoyed at his already soaking wet bangs sticking to his forehead, kicking thick mud from his path so he wouldn't sink into it... He already had the disgusting substance up to his ankles.

"Uhh...How about we go... I guess, like north from where we're standing, kid?" Xigbar suggested, moving forward slightly; Even he was starting to sink. "How 'bout you go in front? You can chop down the leaves and crap while I'll watch out backs. Guns don't chop too well, eh?"

"I guess not, haha." Roxas smiled at the much taller man, summoning his Keyblade. He began to slash down the thick leaves and wines that draped from the trees, making it a lot easier for the two to make there way through the jungle. Their boots squished the soaking grass, and the scurrying of small animals and amphibians made the undergrowth quiver, thunder rumbling in the distance. Fantasia seemed a calm and quiet world, seemingly the entire place being covered in a thick, tropical jungle. No animals had approached them, so all they could report on currently was that Fantasia was indeed alive with creatures beside Heartless, but Xigbar was sure some random Heartless or something was going to try and attack them sooner or later; the exact reason he let Roxas go ahead of him. There was no telling whether the creatures here were intelligent or not, meaning they might be able to think enough to reason that sneaking up behind was a decent strategy. Whether he admitted it or not, Xigbar didn't want Roxas to get hurt, and would rather he himself be mauled.

What seemed like a few hours had passed, and Xigbar groaned. They didn't appear to be getting anywhere, and there wasn't anything that could be used as a landmark, not even a tree stump or mossy rock.

"I think we're lost..." Roxas had stated the obvious, sighing as he sat on a damp rock, not caring whether the seat of his pants and cloak got wet; they were already soaking.

"Yeah, let's take a break.." Xigbar twirled one of his guns and let it rest over his shoulder, a little less straining than simply carrying it. He let his back rest against a tree trunk, waist length hair plastered to his wet cloak and small strands of it coming a loose from it's tie and finding a way to stick to his neck. This mission was turning out to be a whole lot of nothing; A rainy as hell world with a confusing jungle; It was like they were rats in some maze built by scientists, except they couldn't find anything, not even a single Heartless. Xigbar scoffed to himself: If he was a Heartless, he wouldn't come near this world...

"I say we go back to the castle now..." Roxas groaned, and he could already feel that it was starting to rain, but a taller form stood next to him, blocking most of the rain. "Thanks..."

Roxas stared up into a golden orb, and he couldn't see anything in it, not the slightest trace of emotion. If only... He quickly snapped from his slight trance, blushing softly. He was thankful that the rain and lack of light masked his reddened face. Every time he looked at Xigbar... he couldn't see anything. No emotion or anything... He didn't truly expect that there would be any emotion seeing as they had no heart, but the sniper exhibited so much emotion, like Axel or Demyx... He was hoping he would see something there... but he could wait a little longer; Then again...

"We should go find some shelter, kiddo..." Xigbar trailed off at Roxas' saddened look, wondering what was wrong. Maybe all the rain was getting to the kid.

II~XIII~II~XIII

_Something unseen and something secret_

_And maybe someone quite conceited_

_Waiting, waiting... hoping something caves_

_Someone can't face what he craves_

II~XIII~II~XIII

It had been _hours_, and Xigbar was completely sure of it. They had walked and walked... and all they found was a small clearing with a lake. He was even sure they had passed the same spot three times. They might as well just return to the castle. He sighed as he sat on damp and freezing cold rock, resting next to Roxas who shivered. Within a few hours, it had went to light rain and distant thunder to a full brown thunder storm with lighting streaking across the sky and the heaviest downpour Xigbar had ever seen, and even in those short hours, it had turned from day to night, and back again!

He heard Roxas sneeze, and he moved a little closer to keep the tiny teenager warm. The cold was really getting to Roxas, much worse than him, and their soaking cloaks weren't helping.

"C'mon, kid." Xigbar de-summoned his guns, standing and brushing himself off slightly, before offering a hand to Roxas."Ya look like your about to die."

Roxas almost protested, saying that he didn't want a lecture from Xemnas, but technically, they had done their job; They examined the new world and had enough for a small report. And he certainly didn't want to stay here in the rain and get sick.

"A-Alright," He took Xigbar's hand, letting the larger male pull him to his feet, where he opened a portal for the two.

"After you, kiddo," Xigbar gave a small grin, a smirk pulling on the corners on his mouth, hoping to cheer Roxas up, at least a little bit; A smile was earned in return, before it's owner exited Fantasia through the portal.


	3. Horror

A week had passed since the two had returned to the Castle That Never Was. Saix had managed a few angry comments at the state of Xigbar and Roxas, but the sniper had told him off promptly. Xemnas had asked them to rest before they reported to him(mostly wishing for them not to track mud and water into his office).

II~XII~II~XIII

_Falling hard, falling hard _

_The two to pick from, which one to discard_

_Breaking chest and fracturing heart_

_Who's your real counterpart?_

II~XIII~II~XIII

Xigbar sighed, stretching as he exited his room where Roxas stood waiting.

"Guess we better report to , eh?" Xigbar yawned, having just woken up.

"Yeah," Roxas agreed, opening a portal for them into the plain, yet lavish office of their Superior Xemnas. It was the only room was any colors other than gray, white, and blue; A deep blood red for the curtains, which was quite odd considering the Superior disliked colors. The silver haired male sat at a desk near a massive window, reading over papers, oblivious until Xigbar spoke up.

"Uhh, Superior dude, we're here to report on Fantasia." Xigbar said, yawning slightly.

"I see.. Well, your findings?" Xemnas replied with a question prompting for their oral reports.

"Well, it was rainy and muddy, and we heard animals, but we never saw anything." Roxas answered, hands by his side as he let out a breath."We didn't see any Heartless, but we kinda got lost."

"And what else?"

"Well, it goes from day to night real fast," It was Xigbar's turn to explain."And the jungle is kinda like a maze. There might have been Heartless but we don't know for sure."

Roxas stared at Xigbar as he explained the last of the details, for once seeming so serious.. It was kind of charming. He looked quite handsome in the moonlight from Kingdom Hearts, enunciating his scar, eye shining in the light. He had to admit, but he found himself attracted to Xigbar, but at the same time... someone else, a certain pyro... but he felt more towards the sniper standing tall next to him. He would be happy with either of them. He hadn't realized he hadn't been paying any attention when a finger poked the side of his head.

"C'mon, kiddo, time to go," Xigbar said. he had already opened the door to Xemnas' office, holding it open so Roxas could exit before he let it close with a deep 'clink'.

He watched as Roxas walked down the hallway slowly, blond locks bouncing slightly and he almost grinned. Every day that passed, he found Roxas a more beautiful, more fun, and without him noticing, inching into his heart little by little. A few days and their relationship was getting better and better, as long as Axel didn't show up and start flirting like a mad man. He could sense the pyro was exactly liking Roxas and he being together, but he could care less. Xigbar couldn't believe it and he wouldn't admit it for fear of his pride, but he could almost say... he had a crush on Roxas. And his good feelings stopped when he heard the loud call of a certain pyromaniac, who rushed up to Roxas, wriggling his eyebrows flirtatiously. He growled loud; The sight of Axel near Roxas... made him angrier than a hornet whose nest had been trashed. He wouldn't admit it out loud(he thought it might ruin his character) but he might have been a little jealous.

"Hey there, Roxy..." Axel said, grinning."How was Fantasia? I missed asking you since I was on a mission."

"Shit, like Xigbar said a few days ago," Roxas chuckled.

"I see..." Axel trailed off, but one could both hear and feel the underlying tones of irritation and disdain in the layers of his voice, directed at Xigbar. It seemed sometimes like Roxas almost idolized Xigbar, always staring at his direction and grinning happily when he got missions with the man; It made him nauseous.

"Hey, Axel. Roxas, you wanna hang out later?" Xigbar questioned airly, ignoring the pyro, who visibly cringed.

"Sure, I don't think I have a mission." Roxas laughed, but his laughed began to fade as he saw Axel's face, full of underlying anger, revealed only in his emerald eyes.

"Hey, Xigbar, if you'll excuse us," Axel sneered, almost hissing Xigbar's name hatefully."I need to talk to Roxas."

"Alright then," Xigbar shrugged, inwardly flinching slightly. He couldn't believe he was getting worked up like this over Roxas, and with Axel no less. He was angry, but he didn't show it... he had never felt like this. Not as Braig, and not as a Nobody.

He watched silently as Axel walked out of the room, followed by Roxas. He figured he might... 'listen in' on their conversation. He opened a portal as the two walked off, chatting to each other. He figured they were heading to Axel's room, most likely. Xemnas' office was on the fourth floor and there rooms were on the third, so as Axel and Roxas started down the stairs, he took his position on the ceiling above the hallway, a random point in the wall providing him cover. He waited a few minutes, before he saw them approaching the top of the stairs, walking up to Axel's room, which was only two doors away from the stairs.

"Roxas... I need to ask you something important..." Xigbar heard Axel say, as he peeked out from behind a wall closer to the pair.

"What is it Axel?"

"Well... this is going to seem weird." Axel stopped for a moment, scratching his thick mane of firetruck red locks, bending closer to the blond.

"What's going on...?" It was Roxas turn to trail off.

"I want you to be my boyfriend."

Everything abruptly stopped for Xigbar. Axel was there. Kissing Roxas. It felt like his insides were being torn apart. A hand moved towards his chest, clutching the fabric with rage and pain. Why...why...why?


	4. Anger

Xigbar breathed slowly, nearly shaking from the rage boiling in the pit of his stomach, painful sorrow not far behind; It had already been two days and he was still so angry, so...hurt. M-Maybe Axel was just whispering something to Roxas and got close to him, o-or Axel was just... he had to face it; He knew exactly what he saw and was close enough to tell it wasn't a accident and Roxas was enjoying the entire thing. He sighed, holding his head in his hands; Why was he getting so worked up over this? He should... be happy for Roxas... and they weren't supposed to have hearts, to feel any emotion... Xigbar growled. He had no indication Roxas even liked him more than friend, so that was another reason why he shouldn't be bothered by them kissing! He let himself fall back into the rather rigid and uncomfortable cot, not caring that it hurt because of the metal the thin mattress was placed on.

This was all so complicated and Xigbar didn't have a clue what to do besides just go on with life, but he wasn't satisfied with that... there was something wrong about seeing Axel and Roxas, and he couldn't go on with it like this; It would drive him insane! And he didn't dare talk to Roxas... it would be too difficult...

"What am I sayin'..." Xigbar muttered, shaking his head. He might as well just go on about his business...He supposed Saix had a mission for him, so he stood, pulling his hood over his face to hide any showing emotion.

Xigbar exited his room, stepping down the stairs slowly, hand in his pockets. His boots thumped along the stairs until he reached his intended destination, the platform holding the doorway to the Gray Room. As soon a he walked inside, he was glad his hood was up; Axel and Roxas were together, not doing anything romantic: Xemnas' forbid anything of the sort and straying from that law was cause for 'severe punishment', as the man put it. Xigbar tried to ignore the two, but Roxas just had to be nice and greet him.

"Hey, Xigbar! Why do you have your hood up?" Roxas questioned, unaware as he sidled up to the man, eyebrows raised; Xigbar side stepped away quickly.

"'Cause it is." Xigbar gave a curt response lanced with irritation, and Roxas sensed this.

"You must not feel good. So... I'll see you later?" Roxas said, as the sniper approached Saix.

"Whatever." Xigbar nearly snarled, and he could see out the corner of his good eye that Axel gave him a dirty look, pulling Roxas back towards him. Roxas was acting like nothing had happened... but then again, the blond didn't know a thing, and he certainly wasn't going to say a word...

"Hello there, Number II. You've come for your mission, correct?" The blue haired berserker turned towards Xigbar in a bored and vain manner, before his yellow eyes met Xigbar's single orb, which shined through the darkness beneath his hood like a animal's.

"And your hood is up for what reason?"

"'Cause I want it up, got it?" This time, Xigbar snarled, clenching his hands into fists, which surprised Axel and Roxas, who looked over with concern, even Saix' eyes widened at the suppressed anger."Just gimme my damn mission!"

"Calm yourself. You're to go to Fantasia and search for Heartless," Saix hissed, glaring at the sniper.

"Shut the hell up!" Xigbar barked, leaving without another word through a portal.

His boots splashed in mud as he was greeted by a strong downpour, but he could care less as he barreled through the undergrowth, hoping he found a Heartless just so he could destroy it and make a little of his rage go away. Finally, walking for what seemed like a hour, he finally gave up, tired, slumping against a tree.

"Gragh!" Xigbar snarled as he punched the nearest tree, hand instantly exploding with pain and he hissed, holding his injured hand down by his side. Everything was making him so infuriated! Saix with his higher-than-thou attitude, Axel pissing him off at every chance and Roxas not having a clue how much... he hurt him.. He sighed, breathing in and out slowly to attempt to calm himself down. He almost hoped that Saix or something caught them in the act, and they would be disciplined...

Xigbar summoned his arrow guns, stalking off into the jungle.

II~XIII~II~XIII

Crashing, churning, hateful feeling

Many emotions they are concealing

Must come out, must expel

A little thing here and there enough to make pain swell

Wondering, dwelling, acting out

Mind and heart filling with doubt

II~XIII~II~~III

"Axel, what do you think was wrong with Xigbar?" Roxas questioned his new found boyfriend as they rested atop the Clock tower, a safe place where they might share a kiss. He could imagine what horrible things Xemnas might do to them if he found out they were having a romantic relationship; But he couldn't help thinking about Xigbar... the man was just so angry and he even lashed out at him, though not as much as he did to Saix... And he never saw Xigbar with his hood up for any reason. Could... could Xigbar have seen them kiss? He was known for eavesdropping...

"Eh, who cares." Axel stated, giving Roxas a peck on the blond's soft cheek."He gets like that."

A lie.

"Maybe he saw us... and it made him angry?" Roxas said nervously, gripping Axel's arm, and the latter pulled him a little closer.

"I doubt it and if he did, I'm pretty sure he wouldn't say a thing. It'll be okay, Roxas." Axel assured the tiny male, giving him a soft grin.

"You're right... but I'll still talk to him later." Roxas sighed, moving to sit in Axel's lap. He had dreamed of that, loving looks from emerald eyes..only, he was still thinking of Xigbar. He dismissed it, figuring that he was just worried about the man as a friend. Roxas was happy to be with Axel, and he hoped it was last without Xemnas' finding out.


	5. Pain

Xigbar snarled; He was soaking wet all the way down to his boxers and he had mud up to his knees, caked at the top and slimy where it covered his boots from constantly stepping in brown mud. When he got back... he was having a bath and he was going to soak in the water all night! And it didn't help that the scene of Axel and Roxas kissing was floating around in his head like fly. So far... no Heartless had shown up. The only thing he had seen was a green snake lazily slithering across a branch, briefly looking his way before returning to it's search for food.

He had been wandering through the jungles of Fantasia for a undermined amount of time, and he was so tired of endless trees, rocks, and bushes... Was there anything else on this world? He nearly shouted in anger, but he stopped himself, eye wide. Why..Why was he feeling this? Xigbar didn't have a heart, yet the emotion was so strong... rage and confusion swirling in his gut like a hurricane, churning; He realized he was almost nauseous.

"Why.." Xigbar growled, clenching his fists, arrow guns dropped to the ground carelessly."Why?"

He shouted loud, and in the distance a flock of birds flew off, startled at the sudden outburst. Then the bushes beside him began to rumble; He had no time to grab his guns as diamond-like horns slammed into him, grazing his side, and he was thankful to be so skinny. Blood gushed from the wound and he groaned, teeth grit as he opened his eye to see a rhino-like heartless pinning him against a tree. It was midnight black and blue with yellow zig-zag lines running up it's flank on both sides, with trademark yellow eyes and the Heartless insignia branded on it's face, horns snowy white with cracks in them, and clawed hooves. Xigbar snarled and put all his weigh on his back as he dug into the tree, bringing his legs up to kick the Heartless in the face, receiving a loud roar as he dropped to the ground. He quickly grabbed his guns through small spacial portals, jumping to his free before flipping himself upside down. The rhino charged at him, no longer stunned, horns ramming into the tree, uprooting it and sending it crashing down with a tremendous racket. Purple gun arrows stuck into the Heartless' side, and it shrieked, turning and charging again, hooves stomping in the mud.

Xigbar grit his teeth as he fired more round, teleporting around to avoid the beast's massive horns, mud splashing onto his face. More trees came down as the Heartless rhino rampaged, finally managing to snag it's horns on Xigbar's cloak. He was sent to the ground, letting out a pained roar of his own. He was glad his ribs hadn't broken, but he had to quickly roll to the side to avoid the Heartless, taking his chance to grab his guns.

What was wrong with him? He never got this beat up... he took down most Heartless without earning a scratch... This whole thing was seriously messed up, and now he was hurting over it. Xigbar let out a gasp as his side gave a pang, still bleeding though he had dismissed it in his adrenaline rush. Xigbar stood, taking a few shots at the Heartless; He could tell it was almost dead. He portaled into the nearest tree, a massive, sturdy one, sending off more rounds as the Heartless rammed the tree with amazing force. Xigbar waited for it to slam the tree to the ground before he leapt off, wound protesting as he turned himself middair, firing a burst of gun arrows into the monster. It gave a loud, animalistic shriek before it crashed to the side, black body beginning to fade as a large glowing pink heart emerged, floating into the sky to Kingdom Hearts.

Xigbar landed on his feet, but he fell to one knee, gripping his side with a crimson-covered hand; Damn, no potions... He took in a breath, resting as he de-summoned his guns. Saix said to find any Heartless... He didn't say how many. Xigbar rolled his eye as he stood, opening a portal to Vexen's lab, thoroughly covered in a mixture of rainwater, mud, and blood.

"Xigbar! Don't track that filth in my lab!" Vexen exclaimed, seeing the man's condition, more worried about his lab than anything else.

"Aww man, I already did.." Xigbar stated in a mocking tone, sarcastic as he held his side."Just fix me up."

Vexen muttered to himself, shaking his head as he walked off into his laboratory, with silver walls and various machinery everywhere, along with tables and counters with beakers of fluid. The blond returned a minute later with needle and thread, bandages, a damp rag, and a antiseptic; Xigbar removed his cloak. Vexen gently wiped around the wound, earning a growl, cleaning off the caked on mud and blood, before he threaded the needle, slipping it through Xigbar's skin.

"Shit!" Xigbar cursed, flinching slightly.

"Stand still, and straighten up! This won't go right if you slouch, you fool!" Vexen fired back, the sniper glaring at him; He was finished stitching Xigbar in a few minutes, applying some antiseptic around it.

Xigbar sighed as Vexen bandaged his stitched wound, gritting his teeth when the blond pulled it a little tighter. He had reported to Xemnas, bloody and messy, much to the man's displeasure, but he got the job done without dieing...

"Xigbar.. How did you get this?" Vexen questioned, eyebrow raised.

"Heartless came outta nowhere and got me, not big deal, Ice Queen." Xigbar said, shrugging as he put his cloak back on, zipping it down to his waist. He knew why though and he didn't plan on telling Vexen..ever. It was Roxas. Roxas was on his mind...

"I would prefer if you wouldn't call me that," Vexen hissed, putting away his supplies in a nearly drawer."If you'll leave... I don't need anything destroyed."

"Alright..Ice Queen." Xigbar smirked as he opened a portal and disappeared into his bathroom for Vexen could say a word, simply pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance.

II~XIII~II~XIII

_Concentration lost in troubled mind_

_Waiting for feelings redefined_

_Rest me with your sweet voice_

_So that one day I may rejoice_

_Secret thoughts filtering below_

_Surely they might grow_

II~XIII~II~XIII

Roxas yawned as he walked the halls, searching for Xigbar. He hadn't checked the man's room yet, but he figured that he was still on a mission to Fantasia. He passed Lexaeus' room, knowing Xigbar's was a few doors down, tears beading at the corner of his eyes as he yawned again; The standard cot's didn't exactly give a good night's sleep...

He stepped up to the silver door marked with the roman numerals for two, knocking on the door.

"Hey, Xigbar, are you back?" Roxas called out, hoping if Xigbar was there, he could hear him through the door. Inside, Xigbar cringed at Roxas' voice, growling to himself.

He didn't want to talk to Roxas, he didn't even want to hear his voice! He wasn't in the mood...but, should he act cold towards Roxas? What if he still had a chance to go out with him? Surely he couldn't go out with Axel forever.. Xigbar made a disgruntled, pained noise as he swung his feet so that he was simply sitting on his bed.

"Yeah, what is it?" Xigbar asked back.

"Can I come in?"

"Guess so."

Xigbar's door swung open and the sweet blond walked in, closing the door behind him. It almost... hurt Xigbar to see Roxas come in, and it felt like he didn't have a chance at Roxas. He sighed, attempting not to make contact with Roxas, who walked right up to him.

"Hey Xigbar, are you okay? You seemed pretty angry this morning." Roxas inquired, blond locks bouncing softly, and Xigbar couldn't help staring at the beauty in his presence; The thought of Axel and Roxas popped into Xigbar's head again and it made him angry.

"I'm fine..." Xigbar huffed, scowling. He knew in his heart that he wasn't going to get Roxas, that the blond would never like him romantically, that they weren't...going to kiss like that. It was nerve wracking to be like this... and h-he certainly wasn't desperate for Roxas or anything. He could imagine the very _feel _of Roxas' lips, so soft and warm, but he could never tell Roxas a thing..not with Axel here and even if he did tell... it wouldn't make a difference.

An awkward silence arose in the room, the sniper not looking up and the blond not saying a word. Roxas stared at the man in front of him, sensing the anguish, rage, and hints of confusion.

"Something's wrong, Xigbar." Roxa stated. He thought about sitting next to Xigbar... but that would seem odd considering he was going out with Axel, not to mention Xigbar didn't seem to want to talk or have anyone close to him...

"Nope, every thing's cool, kiddo," Xigbar played it off, lieing through his teeth. No, he couldn't let Roxas know.. he was fine... wasn't he?

"Are you sure? You seem angry..." Roxas trailed off as Xigbar stood up, stretching slightly, but he cringed in pain, forgetting the wound. He finally saw the bandages spotted with pale red, filtering into gradually deepening tones of crimson where the blood was freshest.

"I'm fine kid, just in a little bit of pain..." Xigbar grit his teeth, annoyed at Roxas. Roxas didn't have a clue what was going on... Even if he did, why would he care? He's already got Axel, he didn't need him... even as a friend..

"Xigbar!" Roxas blurted out, now irritated as well at Xigbar. Something was wrong, bad wrong. Why couldn't Xigbar just tell him? Maybe he did see Axel and himself kissing in the hallway..."Did you see me and Axel kiss? Is that what's bothering you?"

He whispered the last part so softly so that no one outside the room would hear and Xigbar snapped.

"Yes, I fucking did." Xigbar hissed, approaching Roxas with maniac anger flaring in his eyes, teeth clenched as he growled. "Just stay the fuck away from me!"

He suddenly lashed out at Roxas, slapping the boy onto his bed, the latter letting out a pained and surprised yelp. X-Xigbar... just hit him... in the face...

"W-why..." Roxas could only let out a sob as Xigbar ran through a portal, leaving him alone and in silence. What was wrong with Xigbar? W-why did that make him so angry... Did Xigbar like him? His thoughts were whirling around, centered on Axel, because he couldn't tell or else there would be a fight and their secret might come forth, then Xigbar, who was so bothered by seeing them kiss. He had never told the sniper that he liked him... but at the time, and even now, he liked Axel more than Xigbar..but it was getting to him... He...he just couldn't be mad at Xigbar, seeing them _must _have affected him..


	6. Guilt

Roxas held his cheek gingerly, still feeling a slight amount of pain if he moved his jaw the wrong way. He rested sullenly on his bed, after Xigbar had hit him before running away; It had already been a day. It hurt... but it struck a nerve in him to see how _enraged _and _upset _Xigbar was, only from seeing them kiss. All the pain, the agitation... all nestled inside that lone eye, the only portal into Xigbar's hidden emotions; Roxas felt a pang in his chest. Did...he make the wrong choice? Then again... seeing how estatic Axel was now, he didn't want to leave the redhead, yet, he didn't want to see Xigbar in so much anguish. He couldn't deny...that he had feelings not only for Axel, but for Xigbar as well. He had started experiencing those feelings about a month after he had joined. Axel was his friend at the time, but Xigbar... he was more; He was strong, funny, and he cared, in his own way... Roxas admired him at first, but then the feelings just grew, then Axel had begun to flirt with him by his second month in the Organization. Only on missions, never at the Castle, so he could keep them safe, but he didn't return them. He was waiting for Xigbar, but they never got the chance; Few missions together, no time alone, and Xigbar was busy so often, made it hard to get anything started. And Xigbar never seemed interested, though he could never tell... Roxas never got up the courage to flirt with Xigbar.

Roxas stood, guilty feelings bumbling around in his mind, sighing as he walked into his bathroom, turning the faucet to cold before removing his gloves. He let the chilly water run over his hand, cupping his cheek with a wet hand; The cold helped dull the slight pain and prevent bruising, knowing he had to take care of it himself. He stared at the mirror, his blond locks swaying softly in the air condition's breeze, cerulean eyes troubled. He could imagine Xigbar, standing next to him and holding his close, a arm around his waist; Then he could imagine Axel, doing the exact same thing. He tilted his head, scowling, not knowing which he preferred. Was... it _wrong _to think od them both like that? He was with Axel now... He heard a knock at his door and the blond was stunned for a moment, quickly turning the faucet off, wiping his hands on his cloak as he walked up to the door.

"Oh, hey Axel," Roxas greeted the redhead quietly as he opened the door, Axel looking to the left, then to the right, before he walked in, Roxas closing the door.

"Hey baby. You look a little tired.." Axel murmured, caressing Roxas' injured cheek gently; Roxas let out a breath as he held a flinch in.

"A little, haha...Just exhausting missions as usual." Roxas gave a tiny smile, hugging Axel; He suddenly felt.. guilty. It wasn't that he wasn't telling Axel that he was slapped... but that he was hugging the redhead. Suddenly, he felt dirty, but he didn't understand why. His mind wandered to Xigbar, recalling him getting a mission almost five hours earlier, and he could see the guilt in the man's eye even from across the room.

"I'll bet," Axel laughed."Saix's been angry lately so he's handing out hard stuff. Wanna get some Ice cream?"

"No thanks, I've probably got a mission." Roxas answered, scowling. He wasn't in the mood to do a mission, but he had too. Maybe it would clear his mind some. Hopefully, he wouldn't have a partner and he could simply be alone; He certainly hoped he didn't have to go to Fantasia, at least not today...

"That's too bad. Well, I guess I'll see you later, Roxy." Axel said, bending down to give Roxas a kiss on the lips, chaste and affectionate; He didn't notice Roxas discomfort.

Roxas gave a false smile as he waved goodbye to Axel, leaving his room via the door qhile Axel exited through a portal. Down the hallway and stairs towards the Grey Room, he could hear Saix telling Demyx off for being lazy, as usual, even from halfway down the stairs. As Roxas strolled in, he watched as Demyx pouted, moving away from the irritated berseker, who was facing towards the open window.

"Oh hey, Roxas..." Demyx huffed, summoning his precious sitar in a flurry of aqua bubbles.

"Hey Demyx. Getting yelled at again?"

"As always... I'm just not a fighter..." Demyx sighed, walking off."See ya later Roxas..."

"Uh...bye..." Roxas trailed off as Demyx left through a portal before he walked up to Saix, hoping the man wouldn't blow a fuse.

"Number XIII," Saix didn't even acknowledge him, fingers twitching and hair wild, a sign that he was about to go berserk."You have a mission to Olympus, in the Underworld section... There is a unidentified Heartless, destroy it."

"A-Alright..." Roxas took Saix's restrained reply as a warning, exiting through a portal as fast as he could to the greek world.

He was almost blinded by the sunlight, hardly used to any source of light that wasn't Kingdom Hearts or from the Castle itself. The Underworld certainly wasn't the best place to relax or clear your mind, but it would have to do unless after his mission he took a break to another world. Roxas sighed, heading towards the colloseum's exit, kicking up a slight amount of dust as he pushed the heavy ornate doors open to reveal a swirling blue and green vortex. He walked through the vortex, almost tripping as he emerged onto the forest green and black terrain, akin to solidyified slime. He figured the Heartless would be deeper, inside the cave near the river, where most of the Heartless hung out. Roxas summonded his Keyblade, the Kingdom Key, taking the path towards the underground river of breathable mist that made for water; Souls wandered in the form of white, shining orbs of light. Unfortunately, the exit of the area was _under_ the river of mist, which clogged the lungs with disgusting smoke-like air.

Roxas stared down from a floating platform of black rock, boots crunching and send a tiny shower of rocks into the river; He took a breath before hopping into the 'water', landing safely as he coughed. He ran towards the exit, but oddly, there weren't any Heartless, not even the Ghost Heartless, which probably mean the unknown Heartless was a cannibal and ate them for strength. He could feel the current pull him suddenly, sweeping him into the next area, gripping his Keyblade. Roxas let out a cough, breaching the water so he could toss his keyblade onto land, so he could hoist himself to the path before he was swept away by the current; He couldn't die from the water, but he certainly could from the jagged rocks in the river. Roxas took his keyblade in him, standing and brushing himself off. The Underworld's current was never that powerful... which raised some concern.

"Woah!" Roxas yelped as a small quake rumbled through the area, almost knocking himself off his feet. The quake continued, rocks shaking. Roxas grunted as he rolled out to the side, stalactites crashing down from the cave's ceiling, showering rocks on him. The rumbling intensified, and abruptly, huge rocks shot from the ground as a huge hole opened in the ground, Roxas gasping at the whirling drill poking up from it. A massive lime green squid shot from the hole, drill ceasing it's spinning as it landed in front of Roxas, who let out a growl as a rock nicked his cheek. The squid Heartless gave a shriek, lashing out at Roxas with its tentacles. Roxas rolled to the side again, getting to his feet as fast as possible. His keyblade lit up and he shot a burst of lightning at squid, making it shriek and slam it's tentacles against the walls, rocks raining down. He took a chance to dash up to the Heartless, slashing at the squid's break, leaving a cut from which blue liquid spewed from it. Suddenly, Roxas screamed as the liquid landed on his arm, instantly dissolving the black leather and singing from his wrist to his elbow. The waved his arm frantically, casting Blizzard on his arm just to stop the terrible pain. The squid Heartless recovered, slamming a limb into Roxas' back, whacking him into the wall. Roxas groaned as he hit the ground, slumping against the wall in pain, the squid Heartless aproaching him.

"Roxas!"

Roxas' eyes widened at the voice, but he couldn't tell exactly who it was, his head was spinning like a top; Deep inside, he hoped it was Xigbar. His hopes were dashed when a massive burst of blue and red flame exploded on the squid, roasting it alive immediantly. As it faded, heart floating towards Kingdom Hearts, his blue orbs blinked before he focused onto the skinny form running up to him, holding chakrams and housing a head of wild, fire truck red locks.

"Roxas, baby, are you okay?" Axel exclaimed, dropping his chakrams as he bent in front of his wounded boyfriend, holding him close as he searched his pocket for a Hi-Potion.

"F-Fine...A-axel..." Roxas coughed, back screaming silently, and he could feel warmth sliding down his back. Axel brought the bottle of green liquid to his mouth, letting him take a few sips before he drunk the entire bottle. The scrapes on his back healed quickly, muscle and tissue repairing itself at a amazing rate, skin fusing back together, only leaving scars and a dull ache; His arm's pain disappeared, but the wrinkled skin remained.

"I'm so glad I came..." Axel murmured, hugging Roxas."I don't know, I just had a feeling that I should come check on you. Guess I was right, huh?"

Roxas gave a small smile, glad Axel came... but he wanted it to be Xigbar who saved him, Xigbar who held him close. It hurt, even to admit it in his mind, but he knew what he wanted deep inside.

II~XIII~II~XIII

_Holding inside feelings deep_

_Knowing you can't weep_

_Never knowing, confusion all around_

_Will realization soon be found?_

_Sorry, sorry, I didn't mean it_

_Forgive, forgive, I admit_

II~XIII~II~XIII

Xigbar let out a shout of animosity; He hit Roxas, he slapped him...in the face! Every chance of them being together went down the _drain. _He didn't care that Fantasia's seemingly never ending rain was soaking him to the bone; He deserved it, to be cold and wet. The fact that every mission he seemed to get recently was to Fantasia, it made everything worse. His side ached, and he grit his teeth, glad he was feeling every bit of pain. He couldn't bare to look at himself, even in a puddle of water; It made his chest ache like he was getting beaten with a block of wood. How...could he hurt such the perfect, beautiful existence that was Roxas? He wished that Roxas had hit him back, had knocked him to the ground, had _beaten _the _living shit _out of him. H-He was just so angry, just a blind rage...but that didn't excuse his actions, he knew it... He just.. had lost it.

Xigbar's teeth chattered in the icy wind, but he didn't care, not even bothering to try and stop it, just reating on a rock somewhere in Fantasia; Did it even matter anymore? He stood, moving to his left to lean against a tree, the damp bark cooling his forehead as he panted. He... _yearned_ to hold Roxas close, just to hug him and say that he was sorry... if he had to, _beg_ for his forgiveness; but Axel was there, they were together. It was impossible. Xigbar bit his lip. All he wanted was Roxas... The sniper couldn't deny it any longer, that he wished they were together, that maybe if he had returned Roxas' subtle advances then, they might be together now... He knew they couldn't -wouldn't- be together, ever. All that mattered now was that he apologized... and that Roxas could find it in his heart, or whatever the hell they had, to forgive him.

"That's it...I have too..." Xigbar admitted quietly, slaming his fist onto the tree's truck. He would never forgive _himself,_ if he didn't do anything; He didn't notice the vines moving towards him, creepy slowly down the tree. As he leaned against it, one wrapped itself around his wrist, and he jerked away, cursing. More, and more, slithering up to him from the ground and the tree. He struggled and yelled, as the vines wrapped around his entire body, some slipping up under his cloak and pants, others gripping his neck, cutting off his air.

"N-No...F-Fu-uck..." Xigbar breathed out as he felt himself loosing consciousness, agonizingly slipping into a world of darkness, eye blinking in a futile attmept to focus and gain his bearings as the vines pulled him into the bushes. Finally, after endeavoring to break free, Xigbar lost his hold on reality, closing his eye as he was dragged into a underground cave system, leaving no trace; Vines covered the drag marks with mud.


	7. Suspicion

Roxas was on edge: Xigbar hadn't been seen in four, maybe five days. The sniper _still_ hadn't come back from his mission to Fantasia. It worried Roxas, but Demyx and Axel told him that Xigbar would be fine, that it was to be expected since it was a new world, but... something felt wrong. He had been booked with missions so he had no chance to search for the sniper, and even if he did, he kept being busy with Axel... Every time he was with Axel, he felt _horrible._ His chest ached with each kiss or touch, they made him feel so _dirty. _Now, he imagined that it was Xigbar kissing him, hugging him, laying with him, just being _with _him; It made him feel a little less worse... He held his pillow tight, fingers gripping the rough fabric, Axel's arm wrapped around his waist; The red head pressed closer to him, his other hand stroking Roxas' soft locks. It was a miracle that everyone was out on missions, even Superior Xemnas, which was rare as seeing him show emotion. The blond bit his lip as he thoughts went to Xigbar, possibly lost inside that damned jungle, cold and hungry...maybe even hurt... Roxas pushed Axel's arm away bitterly.

"What's up, Roxas?" Axel questioned quietly, thin eyebrows furrowing at his boyfriend's sour mood, and he knew what was wrong, he just hoped Roxas would talk to him; And it kind of irked him. Lately, Roxas had been almost... captivated by Xigbar and he couldn't understand why.

"You know why... I'm worried about Xigbar still..." Roxas trailed off, letting his eyes slip shut. This whole thing was striking him to the core. He didn't know whether to break it off with Axel and search for Xigbar, telling the sniper that he forgave him, and that... Roxas knew Xigbar must be aching inside, beating himself up; He...he just _knew._

Roxas got to his feet; "You should go now, just to be safe."

"I..I will..." Axel sighed, sitting up; He left through a portal to his room.

II~XIII~II~XIII

_Burning passion lossing flame_

_Another love is to inflame_

_Coming to terms with the light_

_The one eyed man his shining knight_

_Deep inside, the heart yearns_

_Both want their love to affirm_

II~XIII~II~XIII

Axel scratched his head leisurely, strolling into the Room of Fading Nourishment, hoping to find a nice snack before Saix got back and slapped a mission on his head. Demyx sat at one of the small, white tables, nimble fingers strumming a few cords; He looked up before smiling brightly.

"Hey Axel! How's it going?" The sitarist greeted the redhead cheerfully. He ceased his brief playing, setting his beloved sitar on the table in front of him.

"Going okay, Dem...Sorta." Axel gave a chuckle."Hiding from Saix?"

"Pretty much..." Demyx sighed, pouting."You seem distracted."

"A little bit. It's Roxas and Xigbar." Axel shrugged as he searched through the cabinets, passing bags of chips and various items marked with the Organization's symbol. The redhead moved to the refrigerator right next to the cabinets, while Demyx thought for a moment; The blond tilted his head, piping up.

"I've seen them talking together a few times, but that was a while ago, Axel." Demyx mused, scratching his cheek innocently with a gloved finger, other hand holding his sitar in place to keep the instrument from falling, just in case.

"You did?" Axel quipped, settling on a wrapped burger, taking it from the refridgerator, letting it close as he moved to the microwave to his right; He pressed in twenty-five seconds and then the 'start' buttom, leaning against the pearly white counter. He...certainly didn't think... that Roxas was two-timing him with Xigbbar, did he? For all he knew, they could just be good friends, like Roxas and he were, only he never saw them together much. Maybe they greeted each other in the Grey Room or chatted for a few minutes before a mission..but to him, they never seemed to be a connection, even as friends. Of the time he saw them together, Xigbar seemed indifferent, occasionally what could he considered happy, and Roxas just appeared to be trying to start a friendship with the sniper, not a good choice personally, but better than most. Axel couldn't even imagine Roxas... being romantic with Xigbar; The sniper was too old for Roxas, almost in the pedophile range. It almost disgusted him, but then again, he didn't know anything. All he wanted was for Roxas and himself to be together forever, even if it had only been a few weeks. Every moment with Roxas, his chest filled..with joy, like he truly had a heart. And Roxas was-had...been just as happy. Ever since a week ago, Roxas had been acting strange, and it was about the time that Xigbar got his current mission to Fantasia. And when he thought about it, even before that, Roxas had been weird, always staring at the sniper or something.

His burger finished, microwave giving a series of beeps, and he took the steaming burger from the appliance; He unwrapped it as he strolled over to the table where Demyx sat.

"Yeah... Over a two months. They talk sometimes now, but not as often. Xigbar's tended to stay away from Roxas for the last few weeks." Demyx took his sitar in hand, not to play, but to hold it; It soothed him. He didn't know if Axel knew, but his emerald eyes looked suspicious and cloudy, extremely odd for the pyro, even though he didn't appear to be. Maybe Roxas was getting to him? He only saw the blond one time yesterday, and he was just to distracted and worried, probably about Xigbar like Axel said.

"What about before that? Maybe.. 3 months ago, or when Roxas had just arrived?" Axel questioned, taking a bite of his burger, chewing slowly. Xigbar tending to stay away from Roxas for the last few weeks would be about the time that they started going out together. Could they have been together all this? Maybe... Xigbar was keeping away now that they were together, but that would mean Roxas would be cheating on him, if they had been having a relationship... Or could they have started a relationship already; That didn't make much sense...unless they suspected that he might found out.

"Ummm..." Demyx trailed off, looking away for a moment. Axel was giving him a...odd look; it was frightening."Just talking, though I saw them being close together during a mission to Neverland.. That was...four months ago, three months after Roxas had joined, I think.. I might say hugging, but I didn't really see."

"Okay then.." Axel scowled, finishing his burger, crushing the wrapper into a ball. He tossed it leisurely, looking away from Demyx, who's teal eyes widened slightly.

"Are you okay, Axel?"

"Not really. Roxas is acting weird, Dem. Really weird. After hearing what you have to say, I have the feeling that goddamn one-eyed sniper it at the heart of it, and I don't like that. Roxas won't even look at me now, or let me hold him," Axel stated. He knew it was safe to talk to Demyx, he trusted the sitarist, knew the nobody wouldn't ever tell."I gotta find out what's up."

"Axel... I don't know exactly what's going on..." Demyx bit his bottom lip. No one really knew, but Axel got angry sometimes. Extremely angry, and he would go on rampages, burning things down and attacking anyone. He saw it happen three times before, he never told anyone. "Don't hurt anyone...Roxas or Xigbar...Please."

"I...won't..." Axel agreed solemnly, sighing as he laid his head down on the table. "What now?"

"I would wait and see... Ask Roxas when he's feeling better, maybe when Xigbar gets back." Demyx suggested with a soft smile, placing a cool hand on Axel's outstretched arm.

"I will... I'm just worried that there's something between them..."

"I know, Axel. Just wait and see. It'll be alright."


	8. Encouragement

It had been twelve days, twelve _long _days...; Xigbar was still gone. By the eighth day, Xaldin and Lexaeus went searching for him... and then Lexaeus disappeared. Xaldin said they went their seperate ways, going down two paths, and they never met up. No blood, no footprints, and no sign of any animals or Heartless; There was no sign that Xigbar or Lexaeus had ever been there. It was like they had disappeared into nothingness. Xaldin never heard any screams, no rustling of bushes that couldn't be attributed to the wind, no cries for help; Xemnas said that they should start expecting the worse for Xigbar. Missions were postponed to Fantasia, and search parties were going out tomorrow and the day after tomorrow; If they didn't find Lexaeus after a period of days, they were to stop searching... for both of them. It showed, that Xemnas didn't care whether they were found or not, regardless of their history and their number.

"Oh, god..." Roxas voice cracked as the idea filtered into his troubled head: Could Xigbar have faded? That would explain why he hadn't been found, why there was no trace, b-but... there had to be some evidence, broken branches, bushes missing leaves... Something! People-Nobodies...just don't randomly disappear like that. Maybe he had been mauled by Heartless, fallen down a cliff, just..just-

"No.." Roxas shook his head, letting himself fall back onto his bed from where he was sitting, teeth grit tight. He shouldn't be thinking like that, Xigbar wouldn't want him too. He was completely confident that Xigbar could handle himself, even on a unexplored world. So many times, Xigbar had saved him, he was just that strong, fearless, and caring... Even then, against his will, he could imagine it; Scenes of Xigbar laying in that damned forest, bleeding to death and fading, or maybe his bones were broken... all maybes, but possible. He might have been able to call for help... but Xaldin and Lexaeus didn't hear him if that was true. He wouldn't be able to stamch it, if he was told that Xigbar had died, that he would never come back. It...it would break his heart. They never reconciled, and if Xigbar really liked him back, they would never get a chance to be together. Truly,he cared so much whether they got together, but if they could only forgive each other, he would be satisfied; Only, things were complicated with Axel. He didn't know... whether he should tekk everything to Axel now, or wait, but then again, waiting usually made things worse. Axel seemed so happy being with him; he saw it in the red head's emerald eyes. He was so desperate to be with Xigbar that it _hurt,_ chest aching more and more with each day, in the area where his heart would have been; But he didn't want to hurt Axel... he was torn. Xemnas went on and on with that crap about 'not having a real heart' or 'they don't have emotions'. Now, he wasn't so sure that he didn't have a heart, not with all the pain in his chest- no, his heart.

He turned on his side towards the cot's ornate head board, gripping the pillow and bringing it to his chest. He imagined that it was Xigbar, warm body pressed against his, holding him tight, murmuring that everything would be okay; his eyebrows furrowed, opening his eyes, and the dream fell away.

He felt so guilty now... He should have made a better effort to be with Xigbar months ago, had more courage to flirt with the sniper, maybe they would be together now, and none of this would have ever happened... He would be so confused and guilty, and maybe Xigbar... might be alive now, if he was really dead; Roxas could imagine how the man was feeling. He knew Xigbar wasn't trying to hurt him, he was just angry, probably trying to force him away. Considering how long Xigbar had been part of the Organization, that 'no heart, no emotions' crap was most likely affecting him; He might have been denying his feelings, if he had any, which gave him a little hope, but what now? What could he do? He wanted to explain everything to Axel, but it seemed too soon, and there was no one he could talk to in the Organization except for Demyx, but he probably wouldn't be able help him. He gave a groan; He was really only thinking of himself and Xigbar, not Axel. How would Axel feel if he just suddenly broke up after nearly a month, to go with someone else who may or may not be alive... And that fact that he agreed to go out with Axel even though he had feelings for Xigbar, regardless of whether the sniper returned the feelings; And Axel had no idea. He was letting this relationship continue, and he never truly wanted it; God everything was so confusing! Maybe talking to Demyx would be a good idea... The sitarist was lazy and never did his missions, but he was always nice and could cheer anyone, that wasn't Xemnas or Saix, up; He just needed someone to confess to.

Roxas figured Demyx was most likely in his room shirking his work, so he sat up, tossing the pillow onto his bed as he stood; He straightened his cloak out, opening a portal, from which he heard a soft melody he couldn't identify. As Roxas' boots hit the floor, Demyx jumped, sitar flying out of his hands and onto his bed, yelping.

"Oh..." Demyx panted, holding his chest, then he laughed."I thought it was Saix trying to get me. Hiya Roxas!"

"Hey Demyx... I kinda need to talk to you about something, but.." Roxas whispered, giving a pause, looking away for a moment before letting out a breath; He could do this... "You can't tell Xemnas or Saix.."

"Oh man, is it something important? We better go somewhere else so they can't hear us, just in case.." Demyx whispered back, sending his sitar back into nothingness in a flurry of bubbles.

He stood, fixing his mohawk-mullet combo briefly before he opened a portal to his favorite world: Atlantica. No one else in the Organization liked Atlantica, too much singing and merriment if you went close to the city. Demyx opened a portal, water spilling into the room and he went in, and Roxas followed, water engulfing him though he could breath. The portal closed, and Roxas looked down at his body. He was a golden seahorse, with white and maroon stripes and a frilly tail and spines, on his back was a small yellow fin; Of course Demyx took him to Atlantica... He looked around the light blue ocean, in the distance was Atlantic City, and even from their far distance, he could see the lights of the castle and surrounding city. Above him, the sunlight filtered into the water and below, was a ship's wreckage, brightly coral reef in nearly every color imaginable, rocks, and thousands of fish, from rabbitfish to Dottybacks. Demyx lower half was that of a dolphin, bright cornflower blue, with a fin on his back as well.

"Now, what did you wanna tell me, Roxas?" Demyx questioned, swimming closer to Roxas, who crossed his arms in embaressment almost. Roxas had seemed so ... agitated lately. Not to mention Axel had spoke to him about how the teenage was acting, about their relationship, and that he had told Axel about how Xigbar and Roxas were almost together... Now he felt that the the redhead might do something to Roxas... or Xigbar, if the man ever returned. If Roxas _did_ like Xigbar... the fact that the sniper was missing must be pure torture.

"Well, I just need to talk to someone about what's going on... I'm just...so.." Roxas trailed off, holding himself as he looked away from Demyx; It was hard...to even think about what was going on, let alone to talk.

"I kinda already know Roxas... I saw the way you and Xigbar looked at each other before you and Axel.. y'know, kinda went together. I've talked to Axel too. C'mon, talk to me Roxas, you can tell me anything, I won't say a thing." Demyx said softly, placing a hand on Roxas' shoulder in support, a serious expression gracing his face for once.

"Okay.." Roxas agreed, exhaling, brows furrowed. "E-Ever since I came to the Organization, I've... kinda had a crush on Xigbar, but he never returned what little advances I made... Then he saw me and Axel kiss about a month ago or something and he started acting strangely. I tried to talk to him but he was so angry and so he slapped me! And then Xigbar disappeared and now Lexaeus, and I'm just so guilty about everything! That I started a relationship with Axel when I like Xigbar and that I didn't try to be with Xigbar more, and that Xigbar may like me back! I won't let Axel touch me and when he does I imagine it's Xigbar, and even then I still have a tiny bit of feelings for Axel, but I'm just _so _confused!"

Roxas hadn't realized that with every word his tone and emotions escalated, and by the time he was finished, tears like crystalized pearl were pricking at the corner of his cerulean eyes and he was almost screaming every word as he clenched his hands into fists, not caring about the burning pain. He couldn't control himself and the pearly tears began to fall down his pale cheeks, dispersing into the ocean water. Demyx stared at the pained teenager in front of him, and abruptly, he hugged Roxas, because he knew deep down the teenager needed a hug from someone that wasn't on his agitated mind; Roxas gave a muted sniff, bearing his head in Demyx's neck. It wasn' Xigbar, but he was so grateful, even if it was just a simple hug.

"I-I just want to be with X-Xigbar so bad... But I don't w-want to hurt A-Axel! I don't e-even know if Xigbar's s-still alive and I-I keep seeing scenes of him d-dead! If only I c-could s-see him a-again, w-we could f-forgive e-each o-o-t-ther!" Roxas let out a deep sob, all of last weeks pain and anxiety coming out in tears that faded into the salty water, fish swimming below and above them ignoring the unfamiliar beings. He couldn't handle it, he had never experienced anything like this! He couldn't remember if anything like this had ever happened, these intense feelings akin to these of agory, regret, and ardor tearing around in his chest, in the heart he knew he possesed.

"Roxas..." Demyx said in a soft tone, patting Roxas' back soothingly, sensing the pain eminating from the tiny blond."I gotta tell you... It's _not_ your fault, Roxas, it's not... You aren't really with Axel, you just went with him because you were _vulnerable_, and 'cause you couldn't be with Xigbar... I've talked to Xigbar, he just... has a problem with relationships and he was concerned that you were too young since he's twenty seven. He didn't want me to say, but he was sorta scared.. I think he really, really likes you, Roxas. Xigbar has problems with his feelings... Like I said, we _do_ have hearts.." Demyx responded softly, holding his friend close. Xigbar was his best friend, and before Roxas came, the sniper always talked to him. It lessened when Roxas arrived, most likely because the sniper was preoccupied with his growing feelings for the blond, but they still found time to talk away from the Organization during missions. Xigbar would always talk about how much he liked Roxas... or the little moment when the Keyblade wielder would sit close to him or brush against him; Some would say something was truly wrong, but Roxas was eighteen and legal age, and he was mature. He could imagine how Axel would feel if Roxas suddenly left for someone else.

"I-It is.. it is..." Roxas repeated, sniffing and coughing and he wiped his eyes and nose. He let Demyx hold him for a moment more before he finally sighed and moved away.

"No, it's not Roxas... I think you need to talk to Axel, tell him what's up. And if you want to, join the search of Xigbar and Lexaeus..." Demyx suggested, and Roxas turned to him.

"I think you're right... Earlier I thought I should wait... but it's time. Thank you Demyx, from the bottom of my heart.."


	9. Secrets

A deep, muffled groan fell from Xigbar's mouth, and he realized he could barely move; He was trapped in some sort of... slimy cocoon... from his feet, to his face. His vision was blurred beyond belief and all he could see was green. Whatever he was wrapped in, he couldn't see through it. Blinking furiously, e shook his head, hacking up slime as he struggled to break free from the cocoon. The slimy cocoon restricted his sluggish movements, but he managed to make a tear in the viscous yet thick membrane. Xigbar's arm was free, and he began to claw at the cocoon, ripping the film of his face first, hand being covered with thick, green slime. He managed to get his other arm free, groaning as he abruptly got exhausted; Whatever kept him unconcious must still be coursing through his system.. Slowly, Xigbar brought his shaking hand to his face, fingers dragging through the dense slime all over his face. He looked, and his glove was torn, exposing most of his palm and fingers; his fingers were cut, caked with dried blood. Xigbar used his finger and thumb to rub the thick, puke green substance between the digits. When he pulled the fingers apart, a sticky strand of slime connected the digits. Suddenly, he began to cough up the slime that had myseriously invaded his mouth; He quickly turned to his side, vomitting up more of the fluid onto what appeared to be a cave floor. Wiping his mouth and spitting copious amounts of stomach fluids out, Xigbar took a chance to examine his surroundings. He seemed to be in a deep brown cave, with the same slime that covered him plastered on the cave walls and tiny bright green plants. He could see a dull, lumanescent light eminating from the left, but it didn't help; He could barely see his hand in front of his face. Xigbar grunted as he pulled the last of the cocoon from around his legs, pulling the webs made slime away, then the actually green film so he could move. He stood, attempting to wipe the excess slime from his body, but he was still sluggish, almost falling to the ground but he grabbed onto a rock from the cave wall.

"Holy shit... where the fuck am I..." Xigbar groaned, holding his aching head as he leaned on the wall. There was more caked blood from a gash on his cheek, his scarred cheek; Another scar, on top of the old one... Then it hit him: How long was he unconcious? And where was he? Was he even in Fantasia anymore? The last thing he remembered was green vines wrapping themselves around his body and beginning to drag him away, then everything went to oblivion, but that wasn't the fact that bother him, was burning in his chest-no, his heart.

_Roxas._

He might never see the teenager again, never... apoloize to Roxas. And how was Roxas feeling... right here, right now? He couldn't tell if Roxas liked him... all the boy did was get extra close to him, and only three, maybe four times at that... He... knew now, that he had feelings for Roxas, strong, deep feelings. He just... couldn't...say anything.. He had never been in a real relationship, not in over ten years. back when he was around seventeen, a Somebody. He lost his heart and he just... detatched himself, feigning any emotion, even the ones he truly felt. Then Roxas came, and his facade crashed down... but what now? He didn't know if he could confess, and Roxas probably thought he was dead, and glad of it. Roxas was happy, with Axel, it was...okay.

Then, Xigbar heard a deep, muted grunt, and he sensed movement to his right, further down the cave. He turned towards the echoing sound, and he tried to summon his guns, but to no avail; His powers must have been blocked. The sniper inched down the cave cautiously, the groans escalating in volume as the light dimmed as he moved way from it's unknown source. Xigbar crept down the cave's path, and the groans got even louder, seeming only a few feet away, but he couldn't tell; He could barely see from the lack of light. Xigbar prepared himself for a hostile encounter, clenching his hands into fists as he inched toward the noise's source. Bones crunched beneath his boots, some previously demolished and others fresh and intact, and he looked down in disgust and confusion; How many...things had died here and for how long? There must have been thousands and thousands of bones: from skulls to arm bones and everything in between. Xigbar let out a shocked grunt as his boot knocked into something warm and slimy, and he could see the form was a wriggling cocoon like what he was encased in. He blinked, trying to see through the darkness as the muffled grunts increased. Xigbar bent down, guided by touch and barely by sight, and his fingers got cloaked in even more slime as they trailed up the struggling body, more muted sounds directed at the sniper. Xigbar began to tear at the slime cocoon, yanking the slime web off before ripping the film away, exposing a mouth, and the words came.

"Who's...there? Where... am I?" The man wheezed, nearly coughing slime onto Xigbar's face.

"The fuck? Is that you, big guy?" Xigbar exclaimed, and he tore the film from Lexaeus' face harder. The man's head was exposed, then they worked most of the cocoon off, enough to expose Lexaeus' arms so he could tear it off himself.

"Yes..." Lexaeus responded, panting, shaking his head in a attempt to shake off the sudden grogginess."Vines came from the forest... and I...blacked out..."

"Dude, the same freakin' thing happened to me." Xigbar said as Lexaeus clawed the last of the cocoon from his legs, and he stood, but he fell onto Xigbar, who grunted from the sudden weight. He took the weight until Lexaeus was steady; He let the man clean himself off as much as he could. Lexaeus stared down at Xigbar, who physically appeared okay, but he knew the mental strain on the man; he knew what was bothering Xigbar and he could see it in his eye.

"Xigbar, something's wrong... And we.. both know what. We need to get out of here... and you Xigbar, you know what you need to do.." Lexaeus said softly, saying more words than Xigbar had ever heard from the usually silent hero, words filled with meaning.

"The hell are you talkin' about... I haven't done nothin'... You don't know anythin'." Xigbar muttered, eye widening as he backed away from the taller man. Did he... could he even know? Impossible, it was _impossible_. Of the short times Roxas and he were together, it was always on missions, never at the Castle or around anyone; it would have been dangerous. If someone saw, someone... like Saix, who would tell... Roxas and he could be murdered. And he would _never _let that happen to Roxas, even if the teenager was... in love, with Axel.

"Xigbar... this is going to shock you to your core, but I have to tell you, before we leave. I can tell you how you feel, and this gives you a reason to keep going. I've seen everything. I can see how much you love Roxas, I see it in your eye. And I can see how much Roxas loves you back...And Xemnas saw this..." Lexaeus paused, coughing slime up. He wiped his mouth, letting his azure eyes slip shut as his fingers combed through his grimy auburn locks. Was it the right time to tell Xigbar every thing he knew, about the sniper and Roxas, about Xemnas?

"No... No, it ain't true! What ever ya saw, whatever you heard, it ain't true!" Xigbar snarled, lieing through his teeth, keeping his one-eyed gaze away from the silent hero. He couldn't know, Lexaeus _couldn't know_!

"Xigbar. Calm yourself. I know everything, because Xemnas forced me to trail you during missions, in the hallways, _everywhere. _I was given a potion to make me invisible, and to veil all sound from me. I watched you, for nearly five months. I've seen the advances that Roxas made, despite that they were small at best, and I know that you two are in love. Xemnas knew something was up between you two, a relationship, if you could call it that, thanks to Saix. Then, I became his informant." Lexaeus gave a pause, to let all the information sink into the shocked sniper as he sighed, shaking his head.

"He sent you both on missions, to get you killed, without anything leading to him, even though I told him nothing happened. I think, Saix might have found out what I've done, which is why we're both here... in this cave, possibly. And Roxas is with Axel, I know. And he's in danger, Xigbar. You both are, and Axel and I. Anyone involved with us is in danger from Xemnas. He's planning something and I don't know what. Xigbar, you need to confess to Roxas before somethin happens, I know what you're going through... I'm in love with Zexion, myself... I don't know what caught us, but I'm sure that Xemnas is involved. I-I can't say for sure, but when you return, confess and run, to save yourself. Truthfully, only you, Zexion, Demyx, and Roxas are the only members I can trust, that aren't in on it. Others, either I know for sure or I have no clue. "

"B-but..W-Wha...Huh?" All Xigbar could to was stutter. Lexaeus... knew everything... Even that he loved Roxas...He believed the hero, so that meant that Roxas.. really did love him.. Then why was he with Axel? Could Roxas, just went with the redhead because of opportuinity or to make him jealous; It might be the truth, but he doubted it. Even Lexaeus.. and that goddamn Xemnas and Saix... could see that he loved Roxas, but he was too much of a coward to admit it...

"Xigbar, tell me... Tell me what's wrong...You can trust me." Lexaeus approached Xigbar, who covered his face in blatant shame.

"I'm a fuckin' coward... I liked Roxas, but I never said a thing... This is all my fault.." Xigbar said, shaking his head in guilt, and anger, all directed at himself. If he could have done something... made a effort to be with the person he loved... Roxas could be hurt right now, and that was his fault. He had delayed all this and now, they were in danger, if what Lexaeus said was true... Roxas could even be dead now.

"You're not a coward, Xigbar...I know you, known you for over 10 years now, since you were Braig, a teenager, and I was a guard at Radiant Garden." Lexaeus placed a hand on Xigbar's shoulder. "We're gonna get out of here, and then you're gonna go be with Roxas."

Xigbar looked up at Lexaeus, eye angry, but determined. Like hell he was gonng let Roxas get hurt, especially if he was at fault. He was pure and simple determined to escape this cave, and get to Roxas. He knew it was going to hurt Axel and possibly Roxas if he just showed up and confessed his love to the blond, but he had to do it, for himself and his beloved; And to apologize. Roxas at least deserved to hear his atonement. He only hoped that Roxas would forgive him. If the blond rejected him for Axel... it would hurt like hell, but it would satisfy him to get forgiven and to see Roxas happy.

"Yeah, fuck yes... I gotta do it, I gotta. I gotta make this right, Lex. C'mon, we're headin' out." Xigbar announced, expression full of genuine determination and concern. Lexaeus could see the emotion clear as day; Xemnas had to be lying...

"I agree.. We should head towards the light, it might mean the cave's opening. Then we can determine where exactly we are then we can portal back to the Castle..." Lexaeus agreed, and he tried to summon his axe sword, but it was no use. "I cannot summon my weapon...'

"Yeah, neither can I. Guess we gotta fist fight anythin' that gets in our way. We pro'lly can't use portals neither.. C'mon." Xigbar said, and he started back towards the light, with Lexaeus following him close behind. The silent man looked down at the bones crunching under his feet, and his brow furrowed; There must be a monster or a Heartless in this cave considering all the bones, from both living animals and humans. If there was, they didn't have much of a chance without their weapons or appearently, their powers; Must be why Xemnas sent Xigbar here, if he had prior knowledge of the beast. The beast had to plant-based, considering the vines that abducted them had to be under some sort of control. Soon, they were up to their ankles in bones, forced to kick them from their past just so they wouldn't trip and be punctured by the cracked, knife-sharp remains of some of the bones. The light was continueously brightening as their reached it's supposed source, and the two men could see that the path curved to the left, where the light clearly eminated from. Lexaeus knew that Xigbar hadn't noticed the vines at their feet, and if he looked close enough... they pulsed with lumanescent light akin to what was brightening the cave walls.

"Xigbar, stop. I hear something." Lexaeus murmured quietly to Xigbar, outstretching an arm to keep the sniper from moving.

"What.." Xigbar trailed off as he heard... breathing? Deep, rough breathing... like a animal. Then he looked down and saw the vines. They perfectly resembled the vines that wrapped themselves around his body, and he guessed, they were the same vines that took Lexaeus as well.

"Whatever abducted us must be around the corner... We should go back." Lexaeus whispered hurriedly, but a deafening, primal roar haulted the men. Both of them jumped, and suddenly the vines at their feet began to react to then roar. The emerald green vines sprung alive like snakes, first binding themselvs around Xigbar and Lexaeus' ankles. They were tripped, grunt as they hurried to tear the vines away, but more and more snaked their way through the bones, and abruptly, the putrid stench of blood invaded their senses.

"The fuck, I can't get'em off me!" Xigbar shouted as vines began to restrict his arms, slithering up his body.

"The same... Dammit!" Lexaeus cursed aloud as the vines tightened thier grip, squeezing his body to an almost unbearable state, and he could tell the vines were doing the same to Xigbar, the sniper cursing in pain. The vines, they dragged the two men through the cave, their backs being nearly ripped apart by sharp bones and rocks alike; they couldn't tell where they were going, things flying past them until everything was a blur, green, brown, and white streaming into each other. Lexaeus could feel the thick blood oozing from scrapes and gashes on his back, when suddenly Xigbar screamed bloody murder, and a massive amount of blood exploded from the man's back, splattering on the cave walls and ground as they were dragged fast enough to make everything blur into colors and nothing else. He saw jagged bone jutting from the sniper's back as latter in agony screamed, but it some was knocked off and others whacked around into the ground. Paths twisted and turned, appearing to be weaving down a tunnel then vearing off to the left or to the right, going through holes... The light was intesifying until it was horrific, actute burning felt even through your eyelids, and if you opened them... Indistinctly, Lexaeus thought he heard Xigbar scream that he couldn't move his arm...but everythiny was so cloudy. Lexaeus tried to scream but he couldn't, vines choking him as they were brought to a hault; Xigbar was still shouting about the wound, but Lexaeus couldn't make out what the sniper was seeing... it was like he was loosing all control of his senses; he couldn't feel anything, say anything, barely being able to see out of his clouded eyes. He felt... like he was being lifted into the air but he could barely tell, only his sense of hearing and smell keeping him aware of the stench of blood and rotted flesh, bones crunching and disturbing, animalistic breathing filling his ears. He couldn't sense the blood running down his neck from a gash on the back of his head, concious slowly dwindling. He registered a sudden yelp as Xigbar's, and he made out a faded shape that resembled a massive flower... with vines... moving Xigbar towards itself. Lexaeus couldn't tell whether the thing was a beast or a Heartless, and he vaguely registered that he gave a slurred scream. He felt like he had over-dosed on drugs, reality blurring into anything and everything, he couldn't tell what was what, the only thing distiguishable was Xigbar's screams and snarls. Abruptly, Lexaeus was thrown at such a force that he crashed through stalagtites and stalagmites on his path unless he finally slammed into a wall where the cave curved yet again. He had no idea if they had traveled only a few feet or so far into the cave system that the entrance was miles away. Lexaeus was stunned, but he finally let out a trapped cry of piercing pain; He couldn't move either. Then, more screams began to echo towards him. Horrid, agonizing screams filled with a excrutiating pain. Screams that deafened the ears and shook one to their very core. The screams... howls and screeches worse than anyone being raped, being stabbed alive, beaten to death. They were the most horrifying thing Lexaeus had ever heard in his two lives; Nothing could ever come close. And the thing was... they were Xigbar's screams. Xigbar was screaming like that, like he was being raped and burned alive, all the same time, but he couldn't smell fire; Nothing but the smell of wet plants and decaying flesh. The screams went on and on, until Xigbar suddenly stopped screaming: He was either dead, or unconcious. Lexaeus tried his hardest to scream, call out for help, but his body was growing weaker and weaker until all he could do was watch as his eyelids fluttered like a dying bug's wings.

_They finally slipped shut. _


	10. Fight

Roxas' face was expressionless as he stared up at Twilight Town's Clock tower from center Station Heights, waiting for Axel. He had planned to just tell everything to Axel right here, right now, even about his feelings for Xigbar. Then, Demyx, Zexion, Marluxia, and himself were going to search for his beloved Xigbar and Zexion's boyfriend, Lexaeus, with Vexen on standby in case they needed medical attention; They were all the members going out with someone else in the Organization, Demyx and Marluxia, Zexion and Lexaeus, and against Xemnas' forbidden love policy. He hadn't even had the tiniest inkling that Demyx and Marluxia together, until two days ago, when the sitarist had told him everything, and that he would help however he could, then Zexion came and told his his story. Each of them had been together almost since they joined Organization, Zexion and Lexaeus having been together for even longer. A breeze flowed through Roxas' locks and he turned towards the sunset, looking out over the town, golden buildings and streets. He could see nearly every inch of the Twilight Town from the Station Heights, from the strage lime green sea, to the rail road tracks heading into the horizon. Twilight Town was the perfect place for their meeting, no one but Axel, Xigbar, and himself ever came here for missions or just to relax, every other member stayed away. Roxas could only imagine how Axel might react to his confession, but... the fire user needed to know... it was the right thing to do, for all three of them. Roxas brow furrowed in slight fear, biting his lip, but he breathed slowly to steel himself as a portal opened behind him, and he heard boot steps, then his name.

"Roxas.. I think I sorta know what you want to talk about..." Axel announced his presence quietly, but Roxas could hear the subdued anger in his voice. Demyx told him that he had spoke to Axel, just to try and help the red head, but it almost went south. He could tell what Axel was angry about.

"I think I know, Demyx told me a little bit about what you two talked about Axel..." Roxas murmured softly as Axel approached him, but he didn't get too close, keeping space between them.

"First, Axel... I sorry... I'm so sorry..I don't even know how to explain this to you.." Roxas turned towards Axel, and their gaze met, Axel's hard and enraged, and Roxas' determined; He could do this... he had to. If he didn't, all three of them could get hurt permanently.

"You're sorry... _you're sorry? _Ha." Axel sneered, crossing his arms as he rolled his emerald orbs."Why would you even go out with me, if you liked Xigbar. Don't you realize that I love you? I.. I can be better! He didn't even try to be with you when you flirted with him, so why do you still care so much about him?"

"Axel..I know, I'm sorry... I did like you romantically, but... I like Xigbar more. I love him Axel... I do realize that you love me, but... I just... I know Xigbar didn't try to be with me, he had some problems, okay? And I didn't try hard enough to be with Xigbar, so it's partly my fault. Don't blame it all on Xigbar... Do you have a problem with me being with Xigbar, Axel?" Roxas fired back, clenching his hands to keep himself calm, so his voice wouldn't crack under the emotion.

"Okay, so you blame it on yourself? Don't do that, it's not your fault, it's his! Which is why I'm better, I'll try to be with you, Roxas! And yes, I do have a problem. He's too old for you, and... it's weird! Now, answer me! Why did you go out with me when you liked that goddamn sniper?" Axel snarled, lashing his arm out at nothing. Roxas just didn't understand that it would be wrong for Xigbar to be with him! And.. Xigbar wasn't right for Roxas, he was..

"Xigbar's only two years older than you, and I'm eighteen, I'm not underage, Axel! And so what if it's weird? It's _not_ your choice! I went out with you because I was depressed, I wanted to be with you... Maybe I was in denial! And it's not really Xigbar's fault, it's mine! Like I said, I didn't try hard enough!" He couldn't hold it back, and Roxas' voice cracked as tears welled up in the corners of his eyes, but he wiped them away angrily. How could even Axel be acting like this, like he could control him, make his desicions, decide who was right and wrong was wrong for him.

"But still, that seems wrong!"

"You're near the same age, it might as well be wrong to be with you!"

"B-But..." Axel paused, trailing off as he looked away; Roxas caught him that time."Yeah, okay, so what. I'm still better than him, Roxas. Why can't you see that?"

"Because I really don't love you anymore, Axel. I'm sorry, I really am! Axel, you'll never know how sorry I am! You're my friend.."

"Shut up! Just shut up!" Axel suddenly shouted at the top of his lungs, fisting his spiked red locks in anger and pain; betrayal. How could he, how could Roxas even go out with him if he liked Xigbar, and then not even give him a good answer... It was sickening. He couldn't let Xigbar get Roxas... no, he _wouldn't_. He was so sure that Xigbar would do something to Roxas... rape him, abuse him, hurt him... The list when on and on. Or worse, get them in trouble with Xemnas. That would spell torture and punishment for both of them. He could deal with it happening to the sniper, but not Roxas, not if he could help it, but... he still couldn't stomach it; How could Roxas, his best friend turned boyfriend, betray him like this? He bet Xigbar didn't even like the sweet blond...

"Axel, please, just listen to me!" Roxas insisted, hands quivering.

"For all you know, Xigbar could be dead. I bet he ran away to Fantasia and got himself killed on purpose. Then what? You'll come crawling back to me, crying about how he's dead."

Roxas didn't respond. It had to be one of the worst things he had ever heard, and he wouldn't have expected it from Axel; His best friend. It was apallling. He _used _to think Xigbar was dead, the sniper... just couldn't, _just couldn't _be dead; It was still possible, but he didn't think it was true. Demyx helped restore his confidence in both Xigbar... and himself. Confidence... that Xigbar could take care of himself, that if Lexaeus went missing, they might be together which raised their chance of being alive, and that he could admit his love for Xigbar.

"Axel... I know for sure, that Xigbar would _never _do that. Even if he doesn't like me by some random chance, I will _not _crawl back to you, because you've said this to me. I _wouldn't _do it, even if I didn't like Xigbar. I don't have time to be verbally abused like this, I have to find Xigbar! This entire time, I've felt guilty because I didn't tell you anything! Now, I really don't! I know you're angry, but still! Go... Just go! " Roxas screamed at the top of his lungs, face reddened and hands clenched into fists. Angry tears came down, but they were instantly wiped away as the two males glared at each other, before Axel turned away, cloak flapping in the sudden whining fire wielder didn't say a word as he stalked away into Twilight Town, head bowed down in shame, and guilt. Roxas let out another angry cry, unable to hold it in; Everything was so infuriating, Axel and himself being at the center. He was at rest with his guilt about Xigbar, but he didn't have a clue when he would be at rest with what Axel just said or how he acted, even when he poured his heart out into a apology, but he had to take into mind that Axel was angry... and probably felt betrayed.. He couldn't dwell on Axel right now, he had to look for Xigbar, that was his main priority. He had told the little group to wait outside Memory Skyscraper for him so they could meet up before they left for Fantasia. Roxas steeled himself for whatever he may find, inhaling and exhaling as he breathed slowly, images of Xigbar entering his mind, and his heart stirred in his chest, anticipating the sight of the man Roxas came to love. Roxas opened a portal for himself, walking through; He promised that Xigbar and he would return to Twlight Town, have ice cream together, and watch the precious sunset, a nessecary part many of the Organization took for granted. His boots hit the violet pavement and he was cloaked in darkness, only brightened by the neon lights of Memory Skyscraper and the surrounding buildings, Kingdom Hearts pale moon light illuminating the figures he saw awaiting him. They weren't the strongest members, but they would be okay.

"There you are Roxas...If I may ask, how did it go?" Zexion asked softly, just in case any lesser Nobodies may be near, but he was sure Demyx's Dancers and Roxas' Assassin Nobodies had taken care of any aapproaching Nobodies. Xemnas could sense when they were detroyed, but he couldn't tell where, so it was a safe tactic in case Saix or Xaldin had sent their nobodies after them.

"Not as well as I had hoped, but.. I'm fine.. Let's go." Roxas replied, and the small group summoned their weapons.

"Don't worry, we'll find them, I'm sure of it." Demyx assured the tiny male with a soft grin as Marluxia opened a portal. Demyx called two of his Dancers from darkness, and the feminine Nobodies quivered, resonating their confidence in there master between the two; Roxas nodded his thanks. Marluxia called two of his lesser Nobodies up, Reapers, they were called. They stood at attention with tall black bodies seemingly clothes in a cloak like the Organization's that fused into leaves at the bottom where their needle like legs were and collars akin to an open rose. Their gun metal gray sleeves morphed into pink rose buds with long, sharp swords protruding from the bud. They filed through with the pink haired assassin leading the way into Fantasia, then Roxas, Demyx, Zexion, and last, their lesser Nobodies. When the portal closed, only they did a Sorcerer Nobody fly into the light from behind a building, strangling a Dancer in one hand and a Assassin in the other. The silver, mage like being suqeezed the struggling lesser Nobodies until they faded, leaving no trace of evidence as it shuddered, disappearing in a flash of white to report to it's Master.


	11. Search

They were all exhausted, even the lesser Nobodies; They had been searching for two hours now. Mud was caked on their boots up to their ankles, and their bodies soaked with cold rain. Demyx gasped as one of his dancers slipped in the mud and fell head first, but the lesser Nobody quickly recovered gracefully, with a bit of help from it's beloved Master, a wave of thanks radiating to the sitarist, who let the two go before himself. Marluxia and his Reaper Nobodies were slicing slimy vines and branches from their path, Zexion following the errratic scent path of Xigbar and Lexaeus, occasionally sniffing to himself as soaking strands of metallic violet stuck to his forehead. Roxas sighed as he slashed down a bush in their way, damp cloak rubbing uncomfortably against his soft, pale skin. It was just as Xaldin said, there was so sign of any life; No birds, no amphibions, no Lexaeus... or Xigbar. Roxas pushed his hair from his face, wishing it would stay out of the way, but the stubborn locks wouldn't comply as they tromped through the maze-like jungle of Fantasia. He looked over at Zexion, who was sniffing the air, then at Marluxia who didn't appear tired, but if one looked close enough, they could see his shoulders slumping, exhausted from swinging his scythe.

"Marly, you should take a break... Your arms will get hurt if you keep doing that for too long..." Demyx said softly to his boyfriend, laying a hand on the assassin's shoulders, who turned and gave a smile.

"I'm fine, Demyx.. I can keep going." Marluxia said as he cut another group of hanging vines away with his Graceful Dahlia, cringing inside because he was destroying plants, but at this point he realized he didn't really care.

"Do you still have their scent, Zexion?" Roxas asked over the suddenly roaring wind and rain.

"I do! But it's faint!" Zexion yelled back, rain pouring down, thunder rumbling."I think we should rest soon!"

The group nodded to each other as the rain came down even harder, but Demyx used his power over water to create a barrier of water above their heads to shield them from the sky was darkened by clouds, making it even harder to see through the thick bushes and trees. Marluxia's ocean blue orbs narrowed as he watched a group of suspicious, pulsating vines slither across a tree branch. They seemed almost... alive... but it couldn't be true, those vines seemed like they were moving with intent, like they had a brain, which was impossible... The assassin grunted as he sliced through the crawling vines deftly, and blue fluid spurted from the insides.

"Stop. You three, look at those vines. They're bleeding, and they're not any type of plant I've ever heard or seen." Marluxia hissed, stopping any movement. He didn't know if they could sense movement like a snake, but he wasn't going to take any chances, especially since his precious Demyx was with him, not to mention the desperate Roxas and Zexion.

"That's gross..." Demyx's face orphed into one of disgust.

"Their scent..." Zexion gasped. "Xigbar and Lexaeus' scents... the vines are drenched on with their scents!"

"R-Really?" Roxas stuttered as he stared at the vines that oozed ultramarine blue blood, limply falling from the branches; It was like watching at a dead snake, head missing but the vine's body still unnaturally quivering. More vines slid from around the tree's base, some slithering up and others inching towards the small group sinisterly, but Marluxia killed them instantly with his scythe, blood spilling onto the mud and sinking in and mixing with mire.

"I believe that if we follow where the vines originated from, we have a extremely good chance of finding Xigbar and Lexaeus.." Zexion said almost excitedly, holding hs hands close to his face at the thought of finding Lexaeus. The auburn haired man was so dear to him. Deep down he knew the chances of finding them alive were slim to none, but wouldn't say a word to Roxas, he already knew the younger male was troubled enough without knowing that Xigbar might be dead... but... Roxas probably already aware that death was a high possbility. If the vines had their scent on it, it was likely that the vines had something to do with their disappearance, whether they touched them accidentally or... the vines came after them. That had to be it, which possibly explained why they hadn't seen any Heartless or regular animals. Could the vines be part of something much larger?

"C'mon, we gotta go now... The vines are going towards the right!" Roxas announced, pointing towards where the vine's bodies led into the bushes.

"You all, the vines could be something part of something larger, like a Heartless. We'll need to be careful!" Zexion said as the group ran into the bushes, Marluxia and Roxas slashing wildly to clear the vegetation from their path, even Demyx using water to slice away grass and approaching vines. The lesser Nobodies began to shudder maddeningly as more vines approached them. Roxas let out a sudden yelp as a vines twisted around his wrist, but he pulled away with all his strength, snapping the vine; Ultramarine splashed onto the Keyblade wielder's arm.

"They're coming after us! Run, run!" Roxas grunted as more vines came at the group, grabbing his hands and his chest, but Demyx's Dancer scame to his rescue, slashing the vines off of him with graceful movements.

Zexion was fighting off vines from the rear also with the Dancers, Roxas and Demyx the sides, and Marluxia and the Reapers to the front. They were surrounded, snake-like vines sliding towards them with dark intention. Marluxia let his eyes close, and suddenly the vines stopped moving, turning a hidieous mix of brown and green, resembling something melted and burning.

"They're dead, let's hurry!" Marluxia began to run towards the dead vines to what they thought was north, the other following behind them; More vines were coming in behind them, slithering swiftly from bushes and grass, even from up under rocks. The group trampled through the forest, but the Reaper and dancer nobodies stopped, quivering. Demyx and Marluxia stopped for a second, staring at their lesser Nobodies and thanking them silently for their sacrifice, both Nobodies resonating their joy and loyalty between them before the vines errupted from all sides, engulfing and wrapping themselves around the lesser Nobodies; They were torn to shreds, fading away as the group kept their pace up.


	12. Mutilation

Lexaeus blinked slowly, but he couldn't tell where he was from all the bright colored dots dancing in his vision frantically and a massive pain emanating from the back of his head and all over his back. He shook his head furiously, confused. He was still in that cave... but where was Xigbar? The last thing he recalled was Xigbar's horrific screams and roaring from an unknown beast. What... if Xigbar was dead? Roxas would be distraught beyond all belief. He could imagine how the boy might feel if he found Xigbar dead... and how Zexion was feeling. Zexion was the love of his life, the most precious person in the entire universe to him. He was sure Zexion was too worried about him dieing, but the schemer had a knack of never saying a word, even to him... And they were in love. He groaned as he tried to move despite the pain and his bones and muscles shrieking in protest, but he promised to both Xigbar and himself, that they were going to get back to the people they loved, no matter what. He got to his feet, quivering as he felt his back for any broken bones, but he didn't feel anything except cuts and bruises; His chest was another story. He gently unzipped his tore cloak and felt his chest, but he had to hold in a deep scream as he touched a bone jutting from his chest, nearly breaking the skin, and blood was caked around his stomach where there was a gash. Lexaeus had to sit back down, he could get even more serious injuries if he moved around, even if he yearned to. Zexion and he had a long relationship, and it would devastate the schemer if he got worse, or even died, but with Xigbar and Roxas... they were in love and they hadn't even been able to be together; everything was against them and they were just hurting inside. He wanted them to have a chance.

Lexaeus looked at the clean bones around him, everyone of them sucked clean of flesh and muscle, all white but cracked in various places; This cave was like a graveyard, or rather... a bone yard. He nearly gagged as he was hit with the stench of blood. All his senses had returned... maybe it was the slime? It was possible that it had some sort of sense nulling agent inside it, which might explain why they were out cold... but didn't he already know this? Lexaeus could barely remember anything besides Xigbar's screams of anguish and before that, vines coming after him. His head must have been hit hard which probably meant that his short term memory was gone, at least for now... He could even have head trauma such a concussion, so it wasn't safe to move, which meant he couldn't check on Xigbar, if he was alive...; The screams left nothing to imagination. Their only chance was for someone, anyone, to find them, someone not with in league with Xemnas; That would mean he could be murdered for betraying Superior directly, and lying. Lexaeus' vision was steadily clearing, and his adrenaline was dwindling finally, the lesser pains becoming evident as he saw the small... burns?; They couldn't be from bone fragments... maybe the vines had acidic properties, and burned him.. The burn patterns matched where Lexaeus thought the vines might have wrapped around with him, and whatever had burned him has disintegrated his pants and cloak where the vines _must_ have been; He had studied forensics of all kinds in his spare time. If the vines did have acidic properties, and since he didn't get those burns when they were being dragged, the vines probably secreated the acid, which might be one reason why Xigbar was screaming; That meant acid burns, and if they were deep enough, they could get infected, and considering how grotesquely filthy the cave was, who knows what he could get.

"Goddamit..." Lexaeus have a low curse as the pain became infuriated now that his adrenaline was gone. He didn't have anything to rinse burns with, no clean water anywhere near... Nothing clean to wrap the wound in either... He only hoped that maggots weren't inhabiting the area around him. Lexaeus' brow furrowed as he heard a echo from deep within the cave. There were no animals or Heartless... and the monster was most likely gone... so it must be someone from the Organization. Lexaeus close his eyes, biting his lip; '_Please let it be Zexion or Roxas, please..._' The echoes were growing louder, but it was hard to tell, they were so faint and they could be so many tunnels. All he could do was wait.

II~XIII~II~XIII

Painful hours passed by for Lexaeus, just sitting and waiting, bleeding, but he found a way to tear some parts of his boxers off at the end of of the leg holes, pressing them against the large wound on his chest; He didn't have any water to cleanse the burns, and regular fabric could stick if it wasn't damp. His heart was beating in his chest furiously as the footsteps and yells uncreased. He heard his voice.

"_Lexaeus! Xigbar! Are you in here!_" Demyx... it was Demyx... Zexion had to be with the sitarist, and Roxas could be with them. _Help_.

"Zexion! Demyx! I'm here!" Lexaeus used all his strength to yell at the top of his lungs, clutching his stomach as he did so, yell morphing into a groan.

"_We're coming! Hold on!_" It was Roxas' voice this time!

"_Which tunnel are you down?_" Marluxia was calling now.

"I don't know! Follow my voice!" Lexaeus yelled even louder, hoping the echo could send them down the right path. They were going so fast when they were dragged... he had no idea which way they went, but his guess that there were more than one tunnel was correct.

"_We're going to have each one of us go down a tunnel! Roxas and I going down the left, Demyx and Marluxia down the center!_" Zexion spoke back to him, and he could hear the joy in his voice, yet he was fearful.

"O-Okay!" All four of them were there, so that must mean they were against Xemnas as well... Lexaeus wouldn't have suspected Marluxia, but then again, Marluxia was loyal though he always had contempt for Xemnas and Saix. Zexion was with himself, Roxas was going with Xigbar... so that must mean Demyx and Marluxia were together. Surprising, but he didn't mind as long as they were good to each other; Lexaeus never realized that he was like a father to the members he did like and tolerate. He almost felt like crying because Xigbar could be okay... only... he didn't know what happened to the sniper. If the man was severely hurt... could Roxas stomach seeing it? If the blond couldn't, he might have have to restrain him, even with his injuries; Lexaeus was prepared to do that for Roxas. Footsteps from his left from down the cave's corridor increased in volume, from walking to frantic running. His tired eyes focused on Zexion who was dashing up to him, kicking bones from his path and smiling, a rare thing for the schemer to do, with Roxas right behind.

"Oh Lexaeus... Lexaeus.." Zexion crashed down next to the hero, wrapping his arms around the man's muscled neck, placing frantic kisses to the man's face and neck, breathing into his precious lover's neck. "You're not dead..."

"D-Don't worry about me.. please... X-Xigbar n-needs help, last thing I-I heard was s-screaming..."

"Okay.." Zexion nodded."Lexaeus is down the left tunnel!" Zexion was prepared. He took bandages and gauze from his cloak pocket, and handed them to Lexaeus.

"Where's Xigbar?" Roxas said in a frenzy, cerulean eyes wide in distress and fear, yet joy was a underlying tone. He found Xigbar... he really found them, but he was hurt. Roxas gave a fearful gulp as he exhaled, heart slamming around in his chest, trying so hard to calm himself. He... he knew that it was a high chance that Xigbar was hurt, he expected this... He could do this.

"J-Just be careful, Roxas. Steel yourself, you don't know what you might see." Lexaeus murmured, coughing as Zexion didn't attempt to help him; They both know that the wrong movement could impair him worse.

"I will.." Roxas was quivering as he breathed slowly, Demyx and Marluxia approaching from the left. The pink haired man walked up to Roxas, placing a hand on the teenager's shoulder.

"I'll go with you, Roxas."

"D-Demyx, wet the b-bandages and then p-put them on the b-burns..." Lexaeus informed the sitarist who called up a stream of water from nothingness.

Roxas was nearly hyper ventilating as Marluxia followed him down the short tunnel towards another curve; It felt like the longest road in is life. Each step was like wading quick sand, and his body felt like it was a thousand pounds. He kept his gaze towards the bone covered ground, but when he looked up, it looked like the curve was a million miles away, and luminescent green light was coming from the curve. Lexaeus grunted deeply as Zexion and he pressed the wet bandages against the burns on his legs and chest, caked blood wetting and soaking into the thin fabric; It hurt but he could take it. Demyx pulled bandages from his pockets, handing them to Zexion before strumming his sitar to call water onto them; Vexen had given them bandages for emergency wounds that couldn't wait.

"Lexy, you'll need stitches for the wound on your stomach, and I can tell your ribs are broken..." Zexion informed Lexaeus quietly. "Did you see what attacked you?"

"No... but the vines were what abducted us. I know they're attached to a larger creature, most likely a Heartless." Lexaeus gave a soft groan but a kiss to his nose made him feel a little better despite the pain.

"Are the bandages good? I'm gonna get Vexen, okay? He's on standby, waiting for us in his lab," Demyx said as he opened a portal, hopping through it.

"Good-" Lexaeus was cut off by a deafening scream; _Roxas_.

"_XIGBAR! NO, PLEASE, NO! Xigbar! XIGBAR! OH GOD, OH GOD! N-NO, PLEASE! X-XIGBAR! No, put me down! Put me down! I have to help him, please, LET ME GO! XIGBAR, XIGBAR!" _

Marluxia came around the corner, struggling to keep a frantic, weeping Roxas from returning to Xigbar's side, only because Roxas didn't need to see the man's extensive wounds. Roxas was screaming at the top of his lungs, tears spilling from his eyes like waterfalls, and he was kicking and scratching the assassin's shoulders as he was forced away from the man he loved. Vexen had heard the screaming and ran into the cave along with his portable stretchers, green eyes wide. Demyx and Zexion was staring at each other in fear and confusion, then at Vexen, then at Marluxia and Roxas; Lexaeus could only shake his head.

"I should... have warned... Roxas... Demyx, get him, please..." Lexaeus coughed, clutching his legs where the burns were.

_"M-Marluxia, p-put me down, p-please! PLEASE! Don't t-take me away from X-Xigbar! P-PLEASE M-MARL-LUXIA! PUT ME DOWN, PUT ME DOWN! PLEASE! " _Roxas begged, weeping. He was beating Marluxia's back with his fists, clawing at the man's rose colored hair, pulling strands out derangedly, shaking his head back and forth as he screamed incoherent statements in rage and fear. If Marluxia didn't let him go, Xigbar could die! He saw all the wounds... the wounds... All the blood... He couldn't handle it! He had to get back to him, he _had too_! His eyes were so blurred with tears that Marluxia... didn't even look like Marluxia, just a obscure figure of pink and black. He was sniffing as he sobbed, hyper ventilating which caused him to cough uncontrollably through his tears, attempting to suck in breaths but he barely could. He didn't try to wipe the spit dribbling from the corner of his mouth.

"I can't do that..." Marluxia growled as Roxas pulled a tuft of his hair out, back of his head stining but he wouldn't say anything; The tiny pain couldn't compare to what Roxas was experiencing.

"_LET ME GO! P-PLEASE, LET ME GO, PLEASE! X-XIGBAR! XIGBAR! XIGBAR! X-XIGB-BAAARRR!" _Roxas kept screaming Xigbar's name wildly, and Marluxia knew he would have bruises on his back, but it was a small price to pay. He finally reached the group, where Roxas was laid out on a stretcher by Marluxia and Vexen and strapped down, for his own safety. The teenager fought against the restraints deliriously, shouting curses. Vexen and Demyx tried to hold him, but soon, Roxas began to stop struggling. The distraught boy fell unconscious, reddened eyes slipping shut as his head lolled to the side.

"Demyx, Zexion, take Roxas into my lab, then come back here." Vexen ordered hurriedly, and Demyx and Zexion nodded, lifting a out cold Roxas through a portal. "Marluxia, we'll go get Xigbar. Lexaeus, Zexion and Demyx can help you into my infirmary."

"Yes, I'll be fine-"

_"There you are, you son of bitch." _

"Who's... that?" Lexaeus ground out, brow furrowing.

"Axel..." Marluxia snarled, summoning his scythe which he had previously de-summoned so he could grab Roxas. He ran off down the tunnel where Axel's shadow was suddenly splayed across the wall. "Vexen, let's go!"

"Right." Vexen's expression changed into anger, summoning his cerulean blue tower shield, Frozen Pride, and snatching his second stretcher and running with it behind the assassin. Bones were crunched beneath their feet as they pounded down the cave. It didn't take long for Vexen and Marluixa to reach the corner at their pace, skidding through bones and kicking up dust as they reached the corner, where they found Axel was standing over... Xigbar... . Even the Graceful Assassin couldn't handle the site, vomiting all over the ground in front of him and falling to his knees, scythe dropping to the ground and coughing up fluids, gagging as a second wave came but he barely managed kept the food down, and Vexen could only stare at the extensive wounds in pure, unadulterated horror. Xigbar was laying there... The sniper looked like had been torn apart by a million serrated blades, blood splattered across the cave walls coated with thick white and green slime, and most of it in a pool around what resembled the man's body. His chest open for all to view, ribs either completely gone or jutted from the bloody mess in a sea of blood and slime. He was still breathing... one lung inflating in the sea of blood but... the other was completely gone. Blood was still pooling from his body, and there was so many acid burns on his legs that nearly all the flesh and most of the bone was stripped clean, burned away, and his intestines were shredded like paper, some parts hanging off rocks on the walls or laying in the pool blood around him; One leg wasn't attached anymore, resting in the blood a few inches away from it's owner. Maggots were feasting on flesh from his left arm which was surprisingly still intact, while the other was bend into such a contorted shape, barely attached by tendrils of muscle. His missing eye, the scar tissue was gone and replaced with what was healed arteries, resembling the day he lost it. Across his face, under his where the eyepatch might have been, were massive, deep gashes going down to his jaw bone and exposing the inside of his mouth, and trailing from through the missing eye down to his neck, where a river of blood flowed from liberally. Another cut was on his forehead and there was so much blood coming from it that Xigbar's hair was drenched in blood, silver turned into a horrid shade of crimson red. His eye was wide open as if frozen in shock, as he was gasping as blood bubbled from neck and upper torso where chunks of flesh were missing. Bubbling crimson was dribbling from the corner of his mouth as well as thick, green slime dyed pink from the blood. Where Xigbar's scar was... most of the skin was missing. Most of Xigbar's organ were gone, either missing completely, resting in the pool of blood with bite marks splayed on the tissue, or... smashed against the cave walls.

Bleeding arteries were protruding from a open hole in his left arm where maggots were currently eating at the flesh, and some of his fingers were lost. Bite marks where on his arms, legs, and chest, one taking most of Xigbar's left thigh, and massive jagged lacerations were laced on his side and back, any organs near them ripped apart and blood squirted from severed veins. Tiny claws had made slashes through his lips; It seemed like blood was coming from everywhere. Marluxia was stunned, convulsing involuntarily as he gasped, then Vexen's gaze slid from Xigbar's mutilated body, to Axel who stood in the crimson, clutching Xigbar's still beating heart, squeezing it every few seconds to make the sniper's blood spill from the vital organ and run down his arm; The stretcher fell to the ground. Axel gave a demented smirk, letting a chuckle bubble up from the pit of his stomach.

"See Xiggy? Roxas can't have you..." Axel licked his lips in a psychotic manner, dragging a finger along the quivering organ that was slowly dying out because of its lack of a host.

"R-Ro...x-xa...x-xas-s..." Vexen physically and metally cringed at Xigbar's garbled, broken... almost strangled tone, blood bubbling from the gashes on his neck as he attempted to speak, remaining lung palpitating... not to ask for help... but to call for Roxas..

"Just die, you stupid one-eyed piece of shit... Roxy is mine..." Axel snarled softly. Then, he squeezed the heart until his fingers dug into the organ and blood rushed from it, and the organ shriveled up from the lack of blood. The pyromaniac let it fall to the ground; He stepped on it, squishing it into the bloody, slimy, ground, and Marluxia stared up at the man in horror.

"Axel, get away from Xigbar... right now. I order you as a superior member!" Vexen commanded, inching closer to Axel, who scoffed at the academic, rolling emerald eyes with contempt.

"Oh why don't you just shut your fucking mouth, you old bastard. I can't let him leave, so Xigbar's going to have to die here..." Axel cackled derangely, and Vexen saw tears pricking at the corner of the man's eyes; He had never seen Axel cry, not once. Was all this over Roxas? It had to be... but Axel couldn't have inflicted Xigbar's wounds. It would have taken him hours, and he had just appeared as they had found the two... He had been tailing them the entire time, and the rain had masked his footsteps.

"Axel, get away from Xigbar." Marluxia spoke, wiping his mouth. He growled and took his scythe in hand, getting to his feet slowly. He shook, tired from his nauseau, but he was ready. Xigbar wasn't his friend, or even a acquaintance, but... that man wasn't all bad, and Roxas didn't deserve to see Xigbar like this, and have no chance with the sniper. Demyx and he... had found true love. He stopped believing in Xemnas the second he fell in love with the sweet blond. He... couldn't describe the exhileration and joy he found being with Demyx, and he... it was hard to admit it, but he wanted Roxas _and _Xigbar to feel that... Everyone regarded him as vain and arrogant, even sadistic at some point, and most of the time, it was true, but deep down inside... he was a little different.

"I can't do that, Marly. I love Roxas... Xigbar has to die for our love. He does." Axel drawled, folding his arms as he walked around Xigbar, whose eye followed him.

"St-st-sta-stay...w-wa-way... f-from... R-R-Ro-Rox..x-xas-s...l-lo-lov-ve...h-hi-hi-him..." Xigbar croaked, but he couldn't turn towards Axel, body failing him. He let out a loud scream when Axel kicked his side, boot slamming directly into a open wound, and Marluxia rushed at him. His scythe came down skillfully on Axel's shoulder, slicing down the pyromaniac's chest, and crimson splashed onto his scythe, face, and body. Marluxia's expression was solemn, yet infuriated; He knew had to hit Axel before he attacked, but... the fire wielder provoked all of them. If he hadn't have hit Axel, he could have killed all three of them. Marluxia heard running behind him, and he turned. Demyx and Zexion approached them, but then the blond saw Xigbar and he screamed at the top of his lungs in horror. Marluxia's face softened as his boyfriend threw up, almost falling to his knees, but the assassin's quick reflexes let him catch his sobbing boyfriend while Zexion could only shake his head.

"Marluxia... take Demyx away.. When you come back, help me move Xigbar..." Vexen trailed off as he shifted his gaze to Axel, who lay bleeding on the ground, both Xigbar and his blood mixing into a massive pool. Blood ran from the torso length cut, but Vexen made no move to help the pyro.

Marluxia frowned. He disliked taking orders from Vexen more than anyone in the Organization, but this wasn't the time for petty differences. He opened a portal and escorted Demyx through, returning a few seconds later.

"You can lay here bleeding until I come back, when or if, I do at all." Vexen hissed, de-summoning his tower shield. He unfolded the stretcher, adjusting it to fit Xigbar's tall height. The man as nearly, breathing so labored that one had to look close to see the bare movements of his lung. This was one time, Vexen was thankful that high Nobodies could only be killed by the Keyblade...

"I'll help you," Zexion said softly.

"We'll need Marluxia as well... If only Lexaeus could-"

"I'll... help. It hurts... but I can take it..." Lexaeus had made his way through the portal, against Zexion's wishes. He clutched his chest, then his azure eyes locked onto Xigbar, who barely met his gaze through fluttering eyelids. He had expected something like this, considering the screams. Marluxia appeared behind the much taller man, scythe gone and Demyx most likely on a hospital bed.

"Now, what we'll need to do is get him on the stretcher as fast as possible.. Zexion, take any extra bandages you have and wrap them around as many wounds as possible. Then, we'll try and put him onto the stretcher with as less pain as possible." Vexen ordered, moving the stretcher right next to Xigbar despite the blooding; Axel just watched them through empty, souless orbs. He could't even growl, his chest was aching so badly... He couldn't help but let himself succumb to dark slumber. Xigbar was screaming and groaning as Zexion wrapped bandages around his chest and legs as quickly as he could.

"Zexion, muffle some of his screams... Xemnas..." Lexaeus warned his boyfriend as Vexen, Marluxia, and he surrounded Xigbar, who's eye was completely closed; He wasn't screaming anymore...

"C-C-Ca-ca-can...t-t..." Xigbar ground out, but he couldn't fight the slumer anymore.

"He's lost alot of blood. Now that he's going unconscious, we can get him on easier..." Marluxia spoke, as Zexion moved to Xigbar's head.

"All together now, we're going to lift him and then place him on the stretcher...One... two...three!"

At Vexen's count, Lexaus took Xigbar's legs, Vexen his left side, Marluxia his right, and Zexion holding Xigbar's head steady as possible. He was lifted only a few inches off the blood soaked ground, then laid on the stretcher gingerly; If he had been awake, the screams would have haunted them all... They were silent as Zexion opened a portal behind Lexaeus, who backed into the portal and onto the flat, metal flooring of the infirmary's emergency room, Vexen, Marluxia, and Zexion groaning softly. The stretcher was moved directly next to the single table in the floor, and Zexion gently... oh so _gently _pulled the mutilated sniper onto the metal table. A unconscious Xigbar was laid on the table with any fuss, blood instantly staining the tabe; The stretcher was throw away, Vexen and Zexion moving to the station in the left corner of the room, hurriedly clothing themselves with scrubs, gloves, facial masks, and hair caps.

"Go, Lexy...It must hurt..." Zexion said softly as he approached the table where Xigbar lay, pulling a rolling tray of tools and potions with him.

"It does..." Lexaeus finally let out a long groan of pain."But it's a small price to pay..."

Vexen and Zexion began to work on Xigbar, using curative magic, as Lexaeus silently exiting the emergency room with Marluxia behind him.

_Kingdom Hearts, help Xigbar... and Roxas._


	13. Confession

_"He still hasn't woken up? Man, it's been like a month..."_

_"I know... I fear he might may be in a coma. I think the immense amount of stress and the sight of Xigbar... just caused his body to give out."_

_"But... isn't he... like, his body okay, Vexen?"_

_"Yes, Demyx, his body is fine... his mind is just worn out. Here... I'll be back in a minute..."_

Where... was he? Back... at the castle?

Roxas opened one cerulean eye slowly, but everything was a blur. He could just barely make out a figure standing next to him, and another walking out.. of a doorway... Was he in a bed? His open eye looked around the small room; White walls, and he was in a white bed... with a blanket over his body. His other eye managed to slid open languidly, vision clearing enough to that he could make out Demyx, the sitarist's back turned to him and leaned against the wall. He coughed, finally realizing he had a oxygen mask over his nose and mouth, and he quivered. Where.. was Xigbar? He.. He had to go see about the sniper.. his sniper! Roxas began to fidget, trying to sit up but he was exhausted even by the slightest motion,. Demyx jumped at the sudden noise, whirling around, teal eyes widening at the tired face of Roxas, who struggled again, panting

"Roxas! You're awake! Vexen, he's awake!" Demyx called to the academic who had left Roxas' hospital room. The latter hurriedly rushed in, nearly slipping on the slick surface of the white tile floor, having to grip the doorway to keep himself up while his papers fell to the floor, scattering. Demyx laughed, and even a tired Roxas managed a smile at the scene despite his exhaustion.

"Vexen... Where's... Xigbar..?" Roxas ground out softly, turning his head towards Vexen, who attempted to pick up all his dropped papers from the floor, with Demyx's help.

"Xigbar's in his room, asleep. He... doesn't stay awake very long, if he gets up at all, he's been sleeping alot. He's still recovering, and taking his injuries a little hard, but he won't admit it, he's stubborn. He wants to see you, Roxas." Vexen said as he laid the papers on a desk to the right of the bed.

"I want.. to see him..too. What.. about Lexaeus? And.. how long have I been asleep?"

"A month. He's fine, just some burns, broken ribs, cuts, and bruises... Can you sit up?"

"It's exhausting... Demyx, can you help me?... A month.." Roxas muttered the last part of his sentence to himself in shock. He had slept for a month? Would Superior be angry with them for being inactive for so long? When would Xigbar be better? Demyx nodded and moved close to the bed, Roxas slowly wrapping his arm around Demyx's neck, letting the blond pull him up, while Vexen adjusted his pillows so he could sit up without exerting himself. He felt better, sitting up. Vexen gently slid the oxygen mask off Roxas' face, placing it on the desk, though he left the IV in Roxas' arm. Roxas sighed, sucking in air slowly now that he could breath better, eyes closed. He could imagine how Xigbar felt; Guilt, anger... he.. saw the wounds, how extensive they were... And he could just see how the scars might look in his mind, so many of them, covering the man's entire body. The man had enough scars already, Roxas didn't want to see anymore; that meant Xigbar got hurt. Xigbar might even think that Roxas didn't want to him anymore because of how he looked... but that wouldn't be true; Roxas would always... love.. him. Roxas groaned as he tried to swing his legs over the bed to get down, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him.

"Child, should rest, you only just woke up from a month-long coma. You can see Xigbar later, he's not going anywhere for a long while." Vexen scolded the much younger male, frowning. He expected that Roxas would be eager to see Xigbar, but the boy needed to realize that one can't jut wake up from a long coma and go about their business without any consequences; Children... so impatient.

"But..."

"No buts, get back into bed. At least give yourself a few hours to adjust to being awake again before you run off."

Demyx giggled at scene. When Vexen wasn't rambling about his superiority to other members, off concocting some potion, or being irritable, he acted like a father...sometimes.. He much preferred Lexaeus because Vexen usually ran him out of his lab before something was blown up or scolded him for playing his sitar too loud. Hopefully, Marluxia would be back from his mission and they could spend some time together... and if they were fortunate, eavesdrop on a scene between Xigbar and Roxas... It wasn't right, but he wanted to see what happened.

"Please, Vexen? Demyx can take me too... him..." Roxas trailed off as his stomach rumbled. He hadn't thought about the fact that he hadn't eaten a full meal for a month.

"Fine... Just give yourself a few hours, Xigbar's asleep right now. For now, you'll need something to eat. Demyx, would you?"

"Alright, fine..." Demyx huffed, slouching his shoulders as he left through a portal.

"Vexen, are you here?"

Roxas yawned as he look towards the doorway, watching Lexaeus approach slowly, aided by long crutches. He only had his brown and white plaid boxers on, and his legs and upper chest were still covered by bandages. He could see the long diagonal scar etched on the auburn haired man's chest, and he guessed he got it from whatever attacked Xigbar... he barely remembered what happened besides... seeing Xigbar, and screaming for him while Marluxia carried him off; He had to remember to thank the assassin later. If Marluxia hadn't pulled him away like that... he didn't have a clue what would have happened.

"I'm in Roxas' room Lexaeus." Vexen called back, scribbling something down on a piece of paper.

"Oh Roxas.. you're awake now. That's good. I need both of you here, I have something important to talk about, Demyx as well... Hnn, where is Demyx? I would also include Marluxia, but he is gone, yes?" Lexaeus said softly, voice husky like he had lost it from screaming too much.

"Here I am!" Demyx proclaimed, skipping into the room with a tray piled high with burgers, bags of chips, and cans of soda. He sat it on the table to the right of Roxas' bed.

"I didn't need that much food, Demyx," Roxas sighed, scratching his matted locks furiously; It felt like everything on his body was itching...

"Demyx, can you close... and lock the door for me?" Lexaeus asked, inching closer to the chair by the wall, turning to sit down slowly, using his crutches to balance, leaning them against the wall as he rested. Demyx' nodded and did as he was told, the door making a loud 'click' that resonated through the silence.

"What is it, Lexaeus, that requires the doors to be locked?" Vexen huffed, frowning.

"We must be quiet... Roxas, do you know why Xigbar was attacked? Or why, you were attacked in the Underworld?" Lexaeus sighed, looking towards the blond with a grave expression on his chiseled face.

"No..." Why Xigbar was attacked? Roxas thought it was just a random Heartless that had tried to eat Xigbar... And the same situation with him...

"It was Xemnas." Lexaeus whispered, baring his teeth."He sent both Xigbar and you on missions with special Heartless to be killed. Even he saw your feelings for each other... I was his spy-"

"Wait... Are.. you saying that.. Xigbar's injuries are your fault?" Roxas eyes were wide and his face one of blank shock."How could you!-"

Suddenly, two portals opened in the room, and everyone anticipated Saix or someone else. A unanimous sigh of relief was let out at the sight of Zexion and Marluxia.

"Did I miss anything?" Marluxia asked softly, strolling over to Demyx, who grinned.

"Not yet..." Lexaeus trailed off as Zexion placed a soft hand on his bare shoulder.

"Answer me, Lexaeus," Roxas snarled, clenching his fists."Is this.. your fault?" If this was the auburn haired man's fault... he hated to say it, but he... he would kill him.

"Roxas." Lexaeus spoke the boy's name firmly, and Roxas flinched." I was his spy. I lied to him to get him off of Xigbar and you because I saw your feelings as well. I did it to protect you both. That's why I'm hurt as well, because I went and betrayed him. Even Axel is in trouble with him, Demyx, Marluxia, and Vexen, as well... Now I know, that you all in this room, plus Xigbar... are who I can trust. We all the only ones with relationships, besides you Vexen. We have to stick together... If you need to talk, move away from this world, go through two separate portals in two different places, having one of you portal to the other place when you arrive, in case Saix is watching, or Xaldin, Luxord, or Larxene... I don't not know if they are with Xemnas, but we have to be careful, which is also why the door is locked. I don't want to alarm anyone, but I want us to be safe.. Xigbar knows this already... Roxas, as soon as he wakes up, talk to him..."

Roxas looked down sheepishly; It wasn't right for him to blame Xigbar's injuries on Lexaeus, if anything, he should be thanking the hero. It was Xemnas' fault. If Lexaeus was right, then that meant Xemnas ordered it and that it was his fault Xigbar, Lexaeus, and even he, got hurt. He was thankful that Axel had come rescued him from the Squid Heartless. Whether he was Superior of the Organization or not, he was going to pay... For what happened to Xigbar, Xemnas deserved to die a horrible death with the exact pain inflicted upon him. Anyone who was part of it, they deserved it as well, regardless of it was deliberate or accidental.. but that didn't matter right now. All he wanted was to talk to Xigbar, just tell the man everything he felt, all the things he bottled up inside... He had no doubt in his mind that Vexen had taken good care of Xigbar, but he wanted to see for himself... to face wounds, and make Xigbar feel better. He would love the sniper no matter how scarred he was. If he didn't... that would be selfish on his part, and unfair to Xigbar; it wasn't Xigbar's fault. Everything lead back to Xemnas.

"I'm sorry..." Roxas muttered, grabbing his tray silently.

"It's all right, Roxas. I understand your pain..." Lexaeus sighed, feeling the bandages along his leg, wincing at the tender spots.

"Xemnas..." Marluxia mused, flipping his hair as Demyx leaned against him. "I'm not surprised he's behind all this."

A veil of silence hung over the small group, before Demyx piped a few minutes later.

"But what does this mean for us? Will we have to leave? And what if Xemnas finds out about all of us... what then?" Demyx inquired, fear lacing his voice as he gripped Marluxia close to him. The pink haired man was precious to him... Despite all the man's flaws and idiosyncrasies, he saw through that and into the true heart of Marluxia, someone who was both loyal and loving, cunning like fox and caring; Most of them qualities he didn't display often. Most saw him as vain and deceptive, but Demyx put all that behind him and focused on the good. He really did believe that they had hearts, they just forgot how to feel. Xemnas drove the 'we have no hearts' factor into their heads, and it was a case of the amazing power of suggestion; If one suggests it long enough, you start to believe it's real.

"Most likely... If he does, we would be in serious danger, which would either lead to our death, or us prolonging our life by running. Our main problem would be confrontations, since you, I, and Vexen are unable to fight well as who is on his side, while Xigbar most likely won't be able to at all..." Zexion bit his lip as he held a hand to his face, arm propped with his other.

"Well, I've been devising a way to create a either biological or mechanical arm for Xigbar since his right was too badly damaged, and because of spinal injuries, wouldn't be able to function if it had healed... If this is so... I'll need to make it as quickly as possible." Vexen whispered this to the four, but Roxas still heard him, even though he ate.

"You mean... Xigbar lost... a arm...?" Roxas whimpered. Xigbar's arm... gone.. He had expected scars, but not that. When he thought about it, he didn't remember how badly Xigbar was hurt, he was pulled away.

"Yes.. His right arm. I'm just glad that it wasn't his dominate arm. If I'm fortunate, it will only take me a month to create a prosthetic for him. During the time I'm making it, we can make some sort of bare plan in case something happens... Roxas... once you eat your food and rest some, then I'll allow you to visit Xigbar, he should be awake then. Until then, the rest of you, out. And you Lexaeus, need to lie down as well, you legs are healing, but you shouldn't strain yourself." Vexen spoke softly at first, chiding the others as he unlocked, the door, waving them out.

Demyx grabbed Marluxia's hand and lead him into the next room, giggling like a madman.

"I bet Xigbar and Roxas are gonna have a scene... I say we watch!" Demyx snickered, whispering in Marluxia's ear hurriedly as he stood in his tip toes.

"Oooh, perfect. I agree-" Marluxia smirked, giving Demyx a peck on the cheek.

"Eavesdropping? I hate to agree, but I wish to see as well... " Demyx visibly flinched at Zexion's voice, peaking past his boyfriend's shoulder, raising a eyebrow at Zexion and Lexaeus.

"I wasn't expecting that..." Demyx stated in slight shock, teal eyes widening. He switched back to his usual happy demeanor, grinning."Alrighty then!"

Roxas sighed as he paused in his eating, not paying any attention to the chatter between Demyx and Marluxia. Even though he hadn't eaten a real meal in such a long time, he didn't feel like eating... Hearing that Xigbar lost a arm pieced his heart deeply. If it hurt him this bad to just hear about it, Xigbar probably had a meltdown, but... the man was strong, he could take whatever Vexen told him.

"Vexen, did Xigbar lose.." He gulped."His entire arm?"

"He did, but do not fret. When you see him... well, just be prepared. You can see him if you can walk." Vexen sighed, moving closer to the bed, and extending his hand to the teenager. Roxas nodded and took the academic's hand, letting the man pull him to his feet. He took a step and he stumbled, but Vexen kept him from falling. Roxas let go of Vexen's hand, steps shaky, moving towards the door as his hand trailed along the wall for balance. He made it to the door way with no problems, and Demyx managed to see Roxas before the latter saw him, shushing Marluxia, Zexion, and Lexaeus.

"Where's Xigbar's room?" Roxas asked softly as he stepped onto the corridor's cold floor, shivering. He had been in the infirmary before, but he had never seen this area... And there didn't seem to be any entrances or exits... He could ask later, right now, Xigbar was what he needed to attend too.

"Five doors down and to the left."

"C'mon, when he goes down there, then we follow," Demyx hissed, peaking from the doorway, the other three males nodding silently as Roxas wobbled down the hallway, gradually walking better.

Roxas passed the doors slowly, realizing that there were only seven doors in the small hallway, and to the left of the fifth door like Vexen said, was a hallway. He turned down, and he could see a larger room than what he was in, with a bed, a small window, and curtains that were pushed back. Then he saw Xigbar, sitting up in the bed and staring off towards the wall blankly, eyes and expression devoid of any emotion, and his heart skipped a beat. Xigbar had bandages wrapped around his forehead and over where his left eye had been, some wrapped around his neck as well. Across his old scar was another, only horizontal, and most of his face was plastered with claw shaped scars; Across his right cheek, from under his missing eye, and tiny ones through his lip. Halfway down his left arm was bandaged as well, what was exposed covered in thin or large crescent shaped bite marks around his wrist and hand, brown scar tissue leading from his elbow to under the bandages... and his right... gone; There was nothing, not even a stub of the arm was left. His chest was bare and his upper torso was covered in bandages, muscled stomach exposed, but.. most of his tan skin was covered in a massive reddish brown scar. He couldn't see Xigbar's legs, but he suspected that they were covered in bandages as well. Roxas gulped as a sudden bout of anxiety washed over him, but he forced it to the back of mind. That's what the Heartless did to Xigbar... It basically tore him apart, and Xemnas ordered it. His anxiety was drowned out with a wave of anger, and Roxas bit his bottom lip, clenching his eyes shut as he willed the anger away; He could be mad later..

Xigbar didn't make a move when Roxas opened the glass door slowly and slid in before closing it, bare feet barely making a noise as he padded towards Xigbar's bed. The man's ears twitched and he looked over languidly, before his single eye widened, mouth agape.

"Roxas..."

"X-Xigbar..." All they could say was each other names before the room was silent. Outside, Demyx, Marluxia, Lexaeus, and Zexion had made there way to the room, staring through one of the windows.

"I'm sorry, kiddo..." Xigbar said softly, staring at Roxas as the precious blond approached his bed, moving to sit next to sniper. "I didn't mean ta hit you, I was just real mad.. 'M sorry for makin' ya wait for me, and for not bein' with ya.. I should'a returned yer flirtin'... I guess I was kinda... like freaked out at what I was feelin'... I-"

Xigbar chuckled bitterly, shaking his head at himself.

"Even now, it's real hard... ta kinda go out and say how I feel."

Xigbar sighed as he placed his hand where his right arm had been, feeling the soft bandages beneath his fingers. Why.. Why couldn't he just go out and say that he loved Roxas? He really and truly loved Roxas. It was just three simple words... that held so much meaning. It was almost like the words couldn't come out, despite the fact that he wanted to say it, he wanted to tell Roxas everything that he felt, even... the things he wouldn't admit to himself like... that fact that he was almost scared to see how Roxas would react to how he looked now. He had scars before, but nothing like this; His entire arm was gone! The pain.. it was unimaginable. He didn't know how he survived. He knew Roxas must have been so... frightened when the blond saw him laying there, bleeding... He didn't -couldn't- believe Xemnas and his shit anymore. He had a heart, it was beating in his chest right now, physical and emotional, and it yearned for Roxas. His single eye watched as a warm hand with such soft, supple skin touched his right cheek. Roxas' hand was tracing each scar on his face, from old to new. He had never been so... happy before.

Roxas' heart was beating furiously in his chest in joy, and he was smiling. It was exhilarating to finally... finally, touch the rough skin he had dreamed about, scarred or not. He would love Xigbar not matter how many scars he gained. His hand trailed down Xigbar's neck, running along the sniper's large Adam's apple, down his neck until it reached where Xigbar's right arm had been, touching the bandages gently. His other hand was finding it's way to his beloved Xigbar's left arm and resting on Xigbar's shoulder. Roxas let out a soft moan as he laid his forehead against Xigbar's, both males breathing softly. Slowly, Xigbar brought his arm around Roxas' waist, slipping under the precious teenager's medical shirt, rough caressing the pale, supple softness with the pads of his finger, touch feather light as if Roxas' very being was glass. The hand slid along the fabric until it reached locks softer than spun silk and the color of honey, so pure that it rivaled even the sun itself. There was a air of silence. It felt so... wonderful, fantastic... to finally be able to touch Xigbar, to hold him... with no regrets, without any hesitation or fear. They were in love... The feeling he was experiencing... could not be described, it was pure exhilaration. Roxas let himself straddle Xigbar, moving closer, keeping one hand on Xigbar's right shoulder and the other wrapping itself around the man's strong neck.

"It.. It's okay, Xigbar.. I forgive you, I knew something was wrong... it's not your fault.." Roxas murmured quietly.

"It is, kid. If I had have returned your advances, we'd be together, and... well, you know. I just, it felt weird. My chest would ache when I was near ya, and.. my heart would beat fast. I thought I didn't have one. Heh, guess I was wrong.. Then Lex told me everythin' and I was so guilty.." Xigbar admitted, stroking Roxas' blond locks.

"It's alright.. And I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have went with Axel when I liked you... Xigbar.." Roxas trailed off as Xigbar's face got closer, and suddenly, Xigbar's warm hand was on his cheek. Their lips were nearly touching, and his hand was threading itself through Xigbar's pepper locks. He could feel the heat radiating from both of them.

Roxas' breath hitched when their lips made contact, heart skipping a beat and his eyes wide as chapped lips met his own. It.. it took him a second to return the motion; He was in shock, but his heart was screaming in joy. What he had dreamed about, imagined, wished for... was happening. It was the most wonderful thing he had ever felt. Roxas began to kiss back, letting his eye slip shut in pleasure as Xigbar's hand gently tilted his face up. His face felt as if it were ablaze as pulled Xigbar into him, kissing deeper. Xigbar let his tongue slip out and caress Roxas' lips, silently asking for entrance. Xigbar knew this was right, it was what he wanted, Roxas wanted... no, what _they _yearned for more than anything. Even though Roxas' lips were chapped, they were impossibly soft and his heart's pace sped up, pounding against his ribcage frantically.

Roxas' let his mouth open enough for Xigbar's tongue to slither in, the warmth exploring every inch of space in his hot, wet cavern, and he moaned when they're tongues met. Xigbar's hand had moved to his hair again, gripping him and pulling him closer as their kissing intensified. The kiss was broken only so they could greedily suck in air, sneaking heated kisses to every inch of their faces between panting. Xigbar moved his hand to Roxas' left, intertwining their fingers, breathing slowing.

"Kid...Roxas...I..I..." He paused, gulping. Please words, come out..."...I love you. I love you more than anythin'." He.. finally confessed, and it felt like a weight was lifted.

"I love you too, Xigbar."

Xigbar let a grin weave its way onto his face as he hugged Roxas, nuzzling and kissing Roxas' soft hair lovingly. All... all the guilt, and pain.. was gone, washed away into nothingness. He said it, he said 'I love you', to Roxas... and he meant it. It was a dream come true to hold Roxas close to him, the blond smiling. Their lips made contact again.

Their kiss was passionate, slow and

full of love, but it was brief. Roxas

sighed and snuggled close to Xigbar,

gripping his beloved's neck gently as

the latter's lone arm held him close.

"I...I thought you had died, Xigbar," Roxas ground up, suddenly so emotional, tears pricking in his eyes."I screamed for you... I was so scared..I don't want to lose you, to Xemnas or anyone else.."

"It hurt like hell, but don't worry, kiddo, I ain't goin' nowhere. You're stuck with me, forever.." Xigbar murmured, chuckling softly as he rubbed Roxas' back lovingly as he placed a chaste kiss to the teenager's soft locks. "I won't let Xemnas tear us apart. Our love's too strong, kitten." Xigbar nuzzled Roxas to make him lean back so he could kiss away the salty tears that had escaped, noticing how they tasted of Sea Salt Ice Cream.

"Our love is strong... I'll always worry a little, Xigbar. And you're stuck with me too," Roxas let out a chuckle of his own, hugging Xigbar again.

"I'm gonna take care of Xemnas'n and of them, then all of us'll be a-okay. Then you'n me can have ice cream everyday, promise." Xigbar grinned. He was serious. He would keep Xemnas, Saix... whoever was with them away, kill them, if he had too, if they threatened Roxas' life.

"I like that idea, Xiggy." Roxas smiled back, nuzzling Xigbar's chin. I'll be right there by your side... And Vexen said he'll make you a prothetic, so then you'll be able to fight."

"That'll be nice... No matter what, Roxas, I think we're gonna be okay.."

Outside, Demyx was grinning along with Marluxia and holding hands, Lexaeus and Zexion merely leaning against each other and smiling softly.

"They kissed! I knew it!" Demyx giggled, squeezing his assassin close.

"I'm glad to see them together..." Lexaeus said softly."Now, we just have to stay strong."

II~XIII~II~XIII

He.. he was still in the cave; Vexen hadn't came back. Axel didn't expect him too. He groaned as he felt his chest and he felt... bandages? Had Vexen really came back? The bandages were fresh and Axel couldn't feel any blood on them. Looking around, he saw that both Xigbar and his blood had soaked into the ground. How long had he been there? Days... weeks... maybe even a month... but Axel didn't really care. Roxas was gone and was probably off with Xigbar, admitting their... _love, _for each other. The red head hoped that Xigbar was dead, that was his only chance to be with the sweet blond. Axel growled to himself, but his eyes whirled to the the left as he heard the familiar wind-like noise of a portal opening, and he stared up at... Xemnas...

_Holy shit._

"There you are, Number VIII... I've been waiting..." Xemnas gave a sinister smirk as he spoke in a deep, monotone voice, bending down on one knee. He gripped Axel's chin with a hard grip, letting tendrils of black, grey, and silver wrap around Axel.

"X-Xemnas..."

"I was expecting that pesky Number II and V would be dead, but the Heartless failed... Which means I'm going to need a little more help." Xemnas snapped his fingers, and on que, Saix and Xaldin emerged from portals.

"I almost killed him... but Marluxia stopped me." Axel ground out as the tendrils squeezed him tight, making his already aching chest hurt more. Yelping, he attempted to wriggle free from the tendrils, and Xemnas smirked at Axel's blatant pain.

"I see...And without me even asking, how wonderful. How would you be willing to become my.. informant? Lexaeus failed me, and thus he shall be killed, sooner or later... If you say no, on the other hand, I'll have to kill you as well. Saix and Xaldin will be taking care of that task, though." Xemnas said, chuckling darkly. "Which will it be... Axel?"

"I'll... help you.." Axel gasped as the tendrils released him, disappearing. He spat on the cold ground, wiping his mouth as Saix gripped his arm, forcing him to his feet.

"Do not fail Superior." Saix commanded, smirking.

"Or else we'll murder you." Xaldin summoned one of his prized lances, and instantly, it was pointed at Axel's head.

"I.. won't fail.." Axel snarled. He didn't exactly want to be in league with Xemnas.. but it gave him a way to get revenge on both Xigbar.. and Roxas. Roxas should have done the right thing, and chosen him.


	14. Plans

Axel sighed as he headed towards Xemnas' office for a private meeting and for Xaldin to check the wound on his chest. Only Xemnas, Saix, Xaldin, Larxene, and he, the members loyal to Xemnas and his policies. Xemnas still had to brief him about their plans and what not.. Fortunately, siding with Xemnas gave him the perfect chance for vengeance; Xigbar and Roxas were going to pay. If he couldn't have Roxas... no one could. At this point, he didn't really care whether Roxas had romantic or friendly feelings for him, or if they even had a chance together; All he wanted was revenge. He... understood Xemnas now; Love brought nothing but heart break. Hate and anger were the only way to go now. It... hurt like hell to listen to Roxas reject him for someone like _Xigbar. _He didn't care whether Roxas... just didn't understand that Xigbar wasn't right for him. Xigbar was sarcastic, uncaring, and one could even say sadistic. Roxas was a idiot. It just got him so... _angry. _He tried to be nice, kept his lust in check, and even was understanding when Roxas was troubled; All that, for nothing. All he wanted was revenge now... Nothing else mattered. Axel stepped up to Xemnas' office door, pure high quality wood with ornate designs, painted white. His face was full of subdued anger as he knocked on the door, nearly slamming his fist down each time. He almost bashed Xaldin in the face when the door suddenly opened.

He gave no resistance when Xaldin jerked him into Xemnas' room by the front of his cloak, almost falling onto his face, but he caught himself just in time. He looked up into Xemnas and Saix's fierce gazes of yellow and amber, not flinching, only taking a seat in the plush, black chair immediantly to his right that was placed near the wall of bookshelves. He hadn't been in Superior's office before, and it was grand. A wall of bookshelves to the right, to the top left, a massive king sized bed and closet, top was a massive window akin to the Gray Room, and the left was just a simple wall; All was colored in tones of white and gray.

"Number VIII is present... Good. Number III, you can attend to Axel's wound while we... talk." Xemnas said as scribbled down something on a piece of paper in front of him.

Axel's predicament would be humerous to him, if he indeed possessed a heart. Axel has believed strongly in love and emotion, only to have it thoroughly and utterly trampled upon, and by the one he... _'loved',_ no less. That was to be expected really, love was worthless; All emotion except hate, anger, and rage. He thought that Axel might betray him... but he could tell the red head was positively _seething _with rage and hate, and he could sense the strong drive for vendetta; He was almost like a piece of fruit, just ripe for the taking... and vulnerable enough to be twisted to his own purposes by simply feeding off the man's present anger: kill those opposing him and showing emotion, which meant the rest of the Organization. It was... 'sad' to lose a Keyblade Wielder, but there would always be another he could bend to his will. All he had to do now was take advantage of Axel, influence him to think correct, and the traitors would be his; The fire wielder could go undercover. Even his Number II, one of his most loyal members and someone who knew quiet a few secrets, had betrayed him... and for what? Useless love. He had expected Numbers IV, V, VI, and XI to revolt against him at some point, but he wouldn't have thought Xigbar would have. The man was clear thinking and didn't care about not having a heart, nor about any of the other members, and they had known each other since before the Organization.. but no matter; He would have to die regardless of past or present relations.

"Saix," Xemnas called the berserker out, and the man turned to Axel.

"Axel, you'll be tasked with spying on our little traitor," Saix informed Axel, who rested, cloak open while Xaldin redressed his chest. The wound was having a problem healing since it was infected, because of being in that dirty cave unconcious. "Because your wound is infected, you'll need to go see Vexen. That will be your first chance to spy, but keep interaction with II and XIII to a minimum. Xaldin will be administering a special potion to keep the infection from spreading or causing any major damage until you are adequately prepared."

Xemnas observed Saix and Xaldin silently, Larxene giggling at Axel's groan when a needle was shoved in his arm. He cleared his throat, and the nymph looked over, flashing her trademark smile that hid her sadist, cruel nature as she walked over to the desk, hand on her curvy hip.

"Yes, Superior?" Larxene asked sweetly in her high voice, lips plump and pink, smirking; She knew Xemnas had a mission for her.

"I have a special task for you, XII."

Larxene smirked harder, almost grinning, "Perfect."

"Coerce X into siding with us, with your... charm. Make him think the traitors are extremely dangerous and plan to overthrow the Organization, and plan to kill anyone in there way," Xemnas smirked, knowing he was lieing and making it seem like the traitors were the bad guys."If he doesn't agree, threaten him until he does. He'll be quite useful to us."

"Of course, Superior," Larxene giggled, bowing before Xemnas."He'll be ours in no time."

"Excellent, Number XII. Now... Axel, I'll tell you our plans, but I'll need to test your loyalty." Xemnas set his pen down with careful meticulousness, making sure it didn't roll; bending it to his will by placing it. He intertwined his fingers, leaning his chin on his digits as he threw a brief smirk at Axel.

Axel shivered under the hard, calculating gaze of Xemnas, something he never did, even when intimidated. Xemnas eyes... were just so... he could almost call them dead. Devoid of even the slightest trace of emotion, but so fierce, the overwhelming vibe of cruelty, superiority, and manipulativeness was as clear as day. The way Xemnas looked at anyone, sans Saix, was as if they were a complete idiot, easily manipulated, but he had absolutely no remorse; He could be described as a sociopath.

"Anything.." Axel stated. He began to become uneasy from the uncomfortable silence as Xemnas thought. Finally, after a few minutes, Xemnas pointed to Xaldin, and Axel's breath hitched. Xemnas was a sociopath, but Xaldin... was purely sadistic, cunning, and remorseless. His task would be straight forward, and most likely involve pain.

"Xaldin, administer VIII his test."

"Thank you, Superior," Xaldin smirked, bowing slightly. Axel's brow furrowed as a maniac flurry of insanity clouded Xaldin's eyes, grinning."VIII, set a Heartless upon Demyx, your ex friend-"

Xaldin was speaking furiously in a joyful tone, smirking demonically, but Xemnas interrupted him.

"Xaldin." Xemnas chided Xaldin in a strong voice, the lancer looking over slowly, fear exploding in his violet eyes for a split second, followed by confusion, then all emotion vanished as their gazes locked. "Keep yourself in check. Remember, we are preserving the traitors... Our plans?"

"Y-Yes, Superior. Excuse my behavior..." Xaldin exhaled, blinkinf slowly as he regained his compoture, remembering what Xemnas' plans were."VIII, you must be seething with hate for Xigbar. Hurt him. Make it look like a suicide, including a note saying something about hs relationship with Roxas, to create dissonance between the two. This must occur after three weeks from this day, and once past three weeks, complete the task in no less than one week. Three weeks time should be enough for you to make a plan and create a sutable note. Once finished, your loyalty will have been proven, and Superior will inform you of our plans."

"Alright..." Axel was almost in shock, yet slightly filled with glee. The task was diabolical, yet it gave him his first chance to get revenge on Xigbar... He couldn't kill the man, but he could make him suffer.

"You all are dismissed. Stay quiet, stay secretive. Saix, Xaldin, I wish to speak to you privately."

Larxene left silently through a portal, while Axel left through the door; _'A minor mistake,' _Saix thought with scorn. Both he and Xaldin strolled up to the desk, hands behind their backs as they met the gaze of their Superior. They knew exactly what Xemnas was planning... The man had told them everything, because Xaldin and he were the most loyal, knew how to keep secrets, and shared most, if not all, of Xemnas' opinions and methods. If he had emotions, he would whole heartedly praise Xemnas for his plan; A mastery of emotional blackmail, careful planning, and setting the traitors up for utter destruction by toying with their feelings and turning them against each other. Xigbar and Roxas were new to the realm of love, a subjection he knew much about, and out of the small group, most susceptible to their plan; The others would take longer. Xaldin kept his mouth shut, biting his lip.

"Saix, keep a watch on Axel until his task is complete... and after I tell him our plans, just in case," Xemnas chuckled darkly. "Saix you can leace, but Xaldin... stay."

Xaldin gulped as a bead of sweat appeared on his brow, Saix bowing and exiting through a portal and leaving him alone, with Xemnas. He knew what was coming... He exhibited emotion, lost his cool... his feelings of sadism took over, and he knew he would be punished... severely. If he was fortunate, Superior would be lenient. Since they were part of Xemnas.. group, they adopted all his policies, including showing no emotion. And he broke that rule. He began to breath slowly and calmly as Xemnas' got up from his desk, walking around behind him.

"III... you have broke a rule.." Xemnas stated flatly, warm breath washing over Xaldin's strong neck.

"Forgive me, Superior. It will not happen again." Xaldin ground out.

"It better not.." Xaldin let out a grunt when Xemnas pressed a needle into his neck and suddenly... he didn't feel anything... His mind was evaporating and his chest began to feel like it was filled with hardening cement. His violet eyes became blank as he shifted, turning around.

"I am fine now, Superior.." Xaldin's tone held absolutely no note of emotion, eyes blank and face stoic.

"Good. Remember our real plans... You are dismissed, Xaldin."

"Of course, my leige." Xemnas smirked as Xaldin left, staring down at the needle in the palm of his hand; The little serum he whipped up ten years ago still worked perfectly...

II~XIII~II~XIII

Lexaeus stared at the ceiling silently as he laid in a hospital bed, crutches next to his bed. Both Zexion he had promised to watch out for the two lovers until Xigbar was well. Zexion had even set up a special illusion to make it seem like Xigbar and Roxas weren't there, just in case Saix found out about Vexen's secret laboratory. He was sure Xemnas was coming after Xigbar and Roxas personally, but he wasn't sure why. He knew the basics of Xemnas' plans, but most of his information was vague and confusing; He couldn't tell whether Xemnas was lying and had secret plans or was holding true to what he was told: Kill the traitors, get more members, and complete Kingdom Hearts. He was sure Saix, and possible Xaldin, knew the truth, but capturing and intterogating either of them would be next to impossible. Only one member was neutral: Luxord. If they could persuade Luxord to join their.. rebel group, finding out information with Luxord's help wouldn't be difficult. Xigbar, Demyx, and Marluxia were friends with the gambler, so it would be somewhat easy; he didn't want to force the man, but he would help immensely... Maybe Luxord agreed with them, and would help out not because his friends were in danger, but because he believed that they had a heart and love was fine... It was strange, when he thought back to the very beginning of the Organization, when he had just woken up to being a Nobody, he was absolutely emotionless; He didn't feel anything and... he didn't care. And he would feel.. needle marks on his neck sometimes, only every few months. After two years... it was like he had a heart again... Lexaeus figured by then he had become accustomed to simulating emotions but now... It was like he was back to being a somebody, though he was much younger then.

Lexaeus swung his legs over the side of the bed, shivering when his bare feet hit the cold floor. He took his crutches in hand, standing. He figured he should head to the small break room where Zexion was waiting for him; He had laid in bed long enough. He was grateful that Vexen had this hidden section of his lab, only one entrance and exit: a small tunnel in the academic's first flood bedroom, that led to the lab.

The whole situation was worrying Lexaeus enough that his stomach was upset... but Zexion could ease his anxiety, the schemer always did... It was amazing to him, how long they had been together, and without Xemnas finding out, at least until he became the man's informant... He was sure that he had become Xemnas' informant because the man found out, but why the man tolerated him, someone who broke his policies was suspicious. He might have done it to find out about other members.. or to get him killed; Lexaeus groaned. In a way, it was useless to imagine theories upon theories with no proof of any of them; All it would do was worry him senseless. They would find out when they found it... Xemnas' plan could even revolve around making them frazzled and vulnerable by keeping things secret and possibly causng in-fighting... he groaned again; He was over-thinking it... again.

His crutches thumped along the white tile floor as he walked slowly. Vexen said he could leaves the crutches behind in a week, though his bandages could be removed today; The burns needed air.

Lexaeus passed a small room where Demyx and Marluxia were having lunch, bothing of them kissing, so he stepped quietly, not wanting to interrupt the lovers. He guessed Vexen was waiting for him with Zexion, seeing as the scientist wasn't in any of the rooms he passed. The hero's thoughts kept roaming from one thing to another, from Zexion, to Xigbar and Roxas, then to Xemnas, his past, and back to Zexion. As he approached the last door in the hallway, he heard the hushed voices of Zexion and Vexen, and he stepped in, Zexion immediantly smiling.

"Lexy, come sit down so Vexen can take the bandages off," Zexion spoke in his quiet, smooth voice, standing and urging his boyfriend to take his chair.

"Hello there, Zexy.." Lexaeus kissed Zexion on the nose after he sat down, leaning his crutches against the small, circular table.

"Let me get those off..." Vexen muttered as he pulled a foot stool next to the table, letting the silent hero put his feet up before he took shiny medical scissors in hand. He sat down at a chair facing Lexaeus', gently sliding the cold, metal instrument under the bandages and beginning to snip the white cloth away.

"I can tell you're worried, Lexaeus..." Zexion said softly, bringing a chair next to his precious boyfriend, hand on the much larger man's shoulder; He could feel the stress bubbling beneath Lexaeus' skin."Talk to me."

"I am.." Lexaeus admitted, smiling at how Zexion knew his feelings. He shivered when the chilly scissors brushed against his thigh, bandages falling off and revealing wrinkled burn scars that resembled rope burns. Almost instantly, the burns began to subtlely itch. "I'm worried about Xemnas' plans... What if he decided to strike now while we're weak or make us fight each other... I'm.."

Lexaeus sighed in defeat, thick fingers ghosting along his unbandaged leg.

"I'm worried as well, but you're going to worry yourself into a hole if you focus on it too much. We'll know when we know." Zexion gave Lexaeus a chaste kiss on his cheek, not bothered by Vexen's prescence; They were friends.

"You're right... I just need to calm myself..." Lexaeus chuckled as Vexen cut off the last of the bandages from his legs, and the Hero sighed in relief at the cool air.

"There we are, Lexaeus. Just try to rest today.." Vexen pulled his gloves off and threw them in a nearby trashcan."I'm going to go check on Xigbar, now."

Lexaeus watched, silent as usual, as Vexen exited the small room, turning to Zexion when he heard echoing footsteps. He let out a soft gasp as his boyfriend got up from his chair and straddled him, thin arms wrapping around his muscled neck.

"We haven't had any safe time alone for quite a long time..." Zexion murmured. "We should now... while we have a chance."

"I understand," Lexaeus exhaled as he kissed Zexion deeply, thin fingers entangling themselves in his messey auburn spikes.


	15. Persuade

Luxord blinked in frustration as he shielded his icy blue eyes from Agrabah's bright, harsh sunlight; Thank Kingdom Hearts he was almost done with his mission... Suddenly, two weeks ago, Superior Xemnas asked him to collect a certain type of plant that grew in the desert, and again, two days ago; It took forever to find the damn little leaves... He was grateful he remembered where to find them, or else he might have wondered the desert aimlessly trying to find the little buggers. It was quite odd... Why would Xemnas need plants? Especially such weird ones, pure snow white with a pitch black strem that only grew undernearth the sand around Agrabah's only oasis, which was convienently far... far past the Cavern of... secrets, or something, and the city; He didn't bother to remember the names of the landmarks, this had only been his third mission to Agrabah. Maybe Vexen needed the plant and had requested Xemnas send someone on a mission to get said plant, but wouldn't Vexen have come with him to show him where the plant was? That didn't make sense either... He had never seen or heard reports of Heartless past the cavern, not even Shadows; Vexen could have gone himself... So here he was, trudging through the desert, ankle deep in yellow orange sand, but he was only a few minutes away from the oasis, he could clearly see it in the distance. Agrabah was odd, only during sandstorms would mirages appear, but then again, all of the worlds had some sort of quirk to them.

Luxord gave another sigh; This strange mission was just the beginning of how unusual the last month had been.. He had barely seen any of the members after Xigbar disappeared, and after Lexaeus vanished, it was like the castle was a ghost town. Before that, everyone's behavior had been so... erratic. He had expected some absence because they were searching for them, and some members were just busy, but now, it was quite disturbing to him. He hadn't talked to anyone except for Xemnas in the last three weeks, hadn't seen Saix which meant no one had been given missions, and no meetings had been called in more than a month. Could... everyone be simply avoiding him, or maybe be on long missions... but that wouldn't make sense; most, if not all of the members being on long missions wouldn't make sense. It was possible everyone was just extremely busy with Xigbar and Lexaeus' recovery, but... would all the members need to help? From what he knew, only Vexen and Zexion had any experience in the medical field; Xaldin might, but he wasn't sure.

He was a few feet from the oasis, wiping his sweaty hair as he approached the large pool of crystal clear water surrounded by a few sparce emerlad palm trees. The water was clean, so he figured he would take a drink and then start digging-

"Hello there, Luxord."

The gambler jumped and whirled around at the high, grating voice that belonged to the Organization's only female: Larxene.

"Ah, Larxene.. Were you pursuing me?" He answered back with a question, crossing his arms.

"Not at all, Luxord," Larxene giggled. She dug around in her pocket briefly before bring a plastic bag out of her pocket; it was filled with the plants Luxord was searching for. She smirked, dramatically dangling the bag in front of Luxord's face, but all he did was raise his eyebrows, reaching out for the bag. It was placed in his hand, and he nodded. Inwardly, Larxene scowled, wishing she could have made him work for the bag, but Superior Xemnas wanted the gambler on his side, and violence or ill-humored intent wasn't nessecary yet, and she didn't want to anger the silver haired man by turning Luxord off; not obeying the rules meant punishment... _harsh _punishment, and she wasn't keen on recieving any. Cruelty and sadism was her passion, but Xemnas.. was worse. He was even worse than her, devoid of remorse or any other emotion... but they had no hearts, that was a given. She wasn't keen on getting her heart back, all it did was horde all her past emotions and present, and it would get in her way, but she didn't want to dissapoint Xemnas; he wasn't on her list of favorite people, but he was a good connection and betraying him was deadly. She had already seen what he had did to that idiotic sniper and Hero. She couldn't wait until she got her chance at those traitors... She could just imagine forcing Xigbar to watch as she tortured Roxas in from of his eye... She was getting glee from the thought, but she kept it to herself.

"Thank you, my dear. Now, why are you here?" Luxord asked another question as he slipped the bag into his pocket.

"Xemnas told me all about your little mission and I decided to help you out since I knew this plants were sooo hard to find," Larxene laughed sweetly, twirling a lock of bright, almost yellow, blonde hair around her index fingers. "So... what do you think about how... quiet the castle has been? About Xigbar and the other members?"

That was a odd question; How did she know he was concerned about the other members, more specifically... his few friends? It was suspicious.

"How exactly do you know what I'm thinking? I haven't said anything." Luxord raised a eyebrow as he pulled his deck of cards from his pocket.

"I can tell, Luxy. Alot of us are... worried." She siddled up to Luxord, who watched with suspicion as she walked around him slowly. "Xemnas... Saix... a few rumors going around about them... Bad ones."

"Like what... exactly?"

"Not sure, Xemnas is investigating. Said they were trying to do something bad, really bad." Larxene made a exagerated hand movement across her neck, indicating a slice mark. "Said Xigbar might be in with it..."

"Xigbar? I doubt he would do anything.." Luxord paused; His friend was known for pulling pranks like there was no tomorrow."Diabolical. What do you mean... _bad?"_

"Not too sure, but he said something about.. _anarchy_." She whispered the word in his ear seductively, but she wheeled away with a giggle."But it could be nothing, so don't worry. Xemnas just wanted to make sure you knew."

She smirked and giggled, a usual. She was baiting him: making him ask what was wrong, but he had to remember to go slow, only let a little slip; Make it vague. She wanted to keep himk coming back for more information as she released it, adding more and more until he finally decided that it would be safer or join Xemnas, though he may be tempted to betray them as well... but if he didn't agree, it would be time for a little... _fun. _

"Well... that's amiable of you.. But anarchy? I highly doubt Xigbar would be part of anything, he's allegiant to Xemnas. But, I'll retain that in mind. Thank you for the plants as well. If you'll excuse me.."

"Ah, ah, ah.." Larxene giggled, stopping Luxord with a finger. "We can always talk later if I get more info, okay?" Putting on a concerned and sweet ruse was difficult and irritating, but if it kept Xemnas off her back, she would do it. He did promise her power..

"Alright then..." Luxord muttered, still having suspicions peaking in the back of his mind; Why on earth was she being so nice? Larxene was never this nice to anyone, even Marluxia and Axel. The woman waved seductively before she turned and left through a portal, hand on her hip. All Luxord could do was furrow his brow in confusion at the... odd scene. Anarchy? He would expect that from Marluxia, Larxene, or to the extreme, Vexen... but Xigbar? And by other members she must mean Lexaeus, Zexion, Vexen, Demyx, Roxas, Xaldin, and Xion... Speaking of Xion.. No one had seen her in nearly two months. Xemnas had last said she was doing good in collecting hearts... but that didn't mean anything. She might have been on a long mission, but everyone hadn't seen her on any of their current worlds. Fantasia was out of the question; Fantasia hadn't been discovered and she had no idea of it... This talk of anarchy was incredulous... He shook his head and opened a portal; He needed to talk to Xigbar...

II~XIII~II~XIII

Larxene smirked as she looked in the mirror, applying fresh lipstick as she awaited a meeting with Xemnas; He was busy looking into something and he didn't like ro be interrupted. She didn't have alot of progress, but Xemnas requested that they check in as much as possible to make sure their plans didn't go awry. Luxord seemed confused, but convinced, at least enough to make him suspicious of the traitors. He would probably ask someone, they would become suspicious of him and make him think they were lying, then he would come running back to them for answers... _hook, line, and sinker_. A portal openede behind her, and she turned.

"Xemnas is ready for your report." Saix announced, stepping to the side as Larxene stood and sauntered through the portal into Xemnas' office, smirking.

"Ah, Number XII." Xemnas acknowledged her presence, looking up with pen and paper resting next to his arm."A report on X, I suppose?"

"Yes, Superior," Larxene giggled."Gave him a little hint hint towards there being something wrong. Trying for making the traitors be suspicious of Luxord, thus he'll be suspicious of them, and come to us."

"Good, good..." Xemnas said, and Larxene watched as he wrote something down on the piece of paper in front of him; She guessed it was the information on Luxord."What else did you say?"

"I baited him. Hinted about anarchy, pinned some of the rumors and blame on Xigbar, and made Luxord think that we really cared and were worried."

"Perfect... If this backfires, then you know what to do. Team with Saix and find his weak points and if need be, use them. For now, wait and talk to him in a few days or so."

"Yes sir." Larxene exited the room, and then Saix appeared. Xemnas noticed his presence, but didn't look up as he searched his pocket for a key. Rolling the paper into a scroll and slipping a rubber band on it, he pulled the tiny silver instrument from his cloak pocket, moved his hand under his desk, easily finding the secret compartment, and unlocking it, Saix approaching his desk but his yellow orbs were kept towards the wall. He pulled a tiny tab and a doorway opened, slipping the paper inside it and closing it promptly with barely a whisper.

"Putting away reports, Superior?" Saix asked, finally looking down at his superior.

"Correct. You can tell me about your information on XIV now. I want to keep everyone, even Larxene, except you and Xaldin from finding out about Xion."

"Good, sir. It is lost. I am completely certain it is dead. I found blood and pieces of its cloak on Fantasia. If the Heartless didn't finish Xigbar and Lexaeus, it certainly finished it."

"Wonderful. You have done a good job, Saix."

"Thank you.. Superior. I will keep an eye on VIII."


	16. Help and Affection

Axel cringed as he headed towards Larxene's room, clutching his chest as he strolled slowly; it was a week before the beginning of his mission... His side hurt like hell, but only if he moved the wrong way. He was trying to think of ways to fake a suicide, and not coming up with much besides using a gun, but Xigbar's gun made different looking bullets than regular guns, or cutting him with a knife or some sort of sharp object... only he was right handed; Xigbar was left. The cut the marks would be different, not to mention his would be messy and jagged, and Vexen probably could tell that the cut was done by someone other than the sniper, which means his mission would fail... and Xemnas would punish him. He knew how afraid the other members were of punishment, even Xaldin, and he was too, so he didn't dare fail, not to mention he would loose his easiest chance for revenge; He would _not _let that happen. Xaldin had both given him his mission and was experienced with sadism and killing, and he wanted to ask the man for help... but he hesitated. Asking would make him seem weak... but he barely had any ideas, but... Larxene might have been able to help. She always seemed to be flirting with him, so she might be nice enough to give him a few... _tips. _

He stepped up to the door with the roman numerals meaning twelve, and he knocked. Larxene answered and immediately, smirked, hand on her hip as she gave a seductive wave.

"Oh my, Axel, what could you be doing here?" Larxene expressed dramatically, raising her golden eyebrows as she looked up at the red head, leaning against the door.

"I.." Axel gulped, sighing. "I need some tips for my mission."

Larxene's golden eyebrows raised higher, and she smirked, taking her hand off the metal door. Axel was never the type to extremely violent or sadistic, so she expected him to come searching around for tips like a dog looking for scraps. Well, he was cute so she supposed she could do him a favor... just this once. She could even laugh since Axel hadn't gone to Xaldin or Saix, which meant he must have been scared of them. Axel would be just right to toy with.. not make him beg but acting mean to get the secrets to the surface then nice so that he would spill everything. She needed a little action since she hadn't been allowed to mess with Luxord... _yet. _

"Okay... Come in," Larxene smirked, giggling as she let Axel into her room before closing the door deftly. The red head sat down in a small chair close to the wall and a dresser and mirror, sighing as he leaned on his hand, propping himself up by elbow.

"So... what can you tell me for tips?" Axel asked breathlessly, not in the mood for any sort of flirting. He had better things on his mind than her, especially since... he was gay... He nearly slammed his fist into the mirror when a image of Roxas floated into his head against his will and Larxene laughed out loud, shaking her head. The little pyromaniac was head over heels for revenge, she could tell; Making people angry was her specialty.

"Those traitors Xiggy the mutilated and Roxy the bitch must have hit you hard... eh, Axel?" Larxene said in a mocking tone, sticking her lip out in false concern, and she was giggling inside.

"Shut the fuck up, Larxene! I asked you for tips, you stupid bitch! I know what happened!" Axel snarled loud and hard, fist hitting the dresser, which elicited a annoying laugh from the blond, and he hit the dresser again.

"It's so cute when you yell," Larxene cooed, smirking."I'll tell you but you have to... beg."

"Hell no, hell no, Larxene!"

"C'mon, Axel, it's just one little word..." Larxene teased, dragging a finger along Axel's shoulder, and he whirled around, almost slapping her.

"I said _no_!" Axel growled. He stood furiously, the chair spinning on it's legs before it fell down with a crash, and he nearly grabbed the chair and threw it into the wall in a fit of rage. His face was flushed with anger and he was breathing hard, and he wanted to calm down, but he couldn't. He should have known never to come to Larxene. She was the queen of irritation and sadism, and when he thought about it, she was much worse than Xaldin or Saix. They told you off and left you alone but Larxene.. she had to keep bringing it up again and again until you lashed out at her, and then... she laughed... Just like she was doing now. How could he be so stupid? He should and he hated to say, but he should have gone to Saix. They had grown distant in the ten years since they joined the Organization, but they still might have been friends.. somewhat. Sometimes they still talked, briefly, but he remembered a select few of his memories.. when he was Lea and Saix was Isa; when they were like brothers. He stood, frowning and moved towards the door.

"Where are you going, Axel? Don't you need my help?" Larxene asked innocently.

"Not if you're gonna be a bitch." Axel snarled but Larxene stepped in front of him, placing a finger on his chest.

"Just testing you." Larxene giggled, smirking."All that anger is good for you, it'll help you in the long run. Now tell me what you came up with so far..."

She sauntered back to her bed, flopping down and crossing one leg over the other, a false, innocent smile splashed on her face. Axel's blood boiled beneath his skin and his face lit up again, this time in embarrassment. He let Larxene get under his skin. He wanted to smack himself. He knew Larxene was irritating but he gave her what she wanted; his reaction, one could even consider knowingly. He might as well tough it out, he wanted... no.. he _needed_ to get revenge and if he couldn't get a good idea, he was screwed in two ways. Axel sighed and turned away from Larxene, breathing in and out slowly to try and calm himself before he spoke.

"Just so you know... I didn't do anything, Axel." Larxene said, shrugging."I just wanted to help."

"You did, and you know it.. And you didn't help..." Axel huffed.

"Oh... I did? I'm sorry... Tell me all about it.."

"I don't want too..."

"Alright then. Keep it pent up until you finally go off on someone.. like Xaldin or me and then you'll get killed and never get any revenge..." Larxene mused exaggeratedly, waving her hand around before making a slicing motion across her neck and then a stabbing motion to her head. She gave a giggle.

"Fine... I liked Roxas and we started going out and it was going good then Roxas started acting weird and wouldn't let me touch him and stuff. Turns out he liked Xigbar even though he was with me! After telling me off the little bitch...!" Axel ranted on, snarling and muttering a variety of things, and all the while, Larxene was smirking. It was a classic example of love gone wrong, and exactly why love should be rightly extinguished. She couldn't help but giggle at Axel's statement about squeezing Xigbar's heart. He must have been extremely angry at that one eyed son of a bitch to do something so disgustingly humorous. Xemnas was completely right in his policies... By the time Axel finished, his face was red and he was pacing around Larxene's room furiously. Larxene clapped her hands briefly.

"All I came up with so far was using a gun or cutting him, but neither of those work. I'm right handed, Xigbar's left..." Axel huffed, shrugging his shoulders.

"Both of those two are shitty ideas. A really good idea would be making him overdose on sleeping pills or something, but, we still want him alive, so better do something after you dose him to get attention so he doesn't die. I would go with that idea, especially since it's possible for Xiggy to do." Larxene stated.

Axel pondered Larxene's statement for a moment.

"I like that idea.. but I would like to hurt him.." He growled the last part, brushing his wild hair back some.

"You'll get your chance, we all will," Larxene smirked, laughing. "Revenge is even sweeter if you wait until the right moment."

"Alright..." Axel sighed."I guess that's good enough for now..."

II~XIII~II~XIII

"Are the bandages on my legs comin' off for good soon?" Xigbar asked, Roxas laying against his right side, both snuggling under a white blanket in the sniper's infirmary room. Xigbar looked down at Roxas with a grin, not being able to resist running his hand along Roxas' cheek. Vexen stood over him with scissors, snipping off the bandages on his chest slowly, exposing a long jagged scar running from his neck nearly to his close to his navel, the skin on his chest to the left and right covered in sparse, tiny scars, all from where the skin and tissue mended itself back together.

"Yes... today if you want since they've healed properly. You can stay in bed and in a week or less after the bandages come off, I'll be helping you begin walking again. I'll start possible schematics on your prosthetic now, and hopefully it will be a biological arm." Vexen answered, taking the dirty bandages away and dropping them into a plastic bag. "And you need to take a bath... today. I can take the bandages off now so you can bathe... "

"I'll help Xigbar bathe." Roxas said, and Xigbar grinned at that.

"Well, please do, both of you smell. You can take one after I finish getting the bandages off," Vexen nodded to himself as he took Xigbar's arm in one hand, starting to cut the bandages off. "Also, until we get any real news on the other members, we can rest somewhat easy. This section is completely hidden. Xigbar, if you don't mind me asking, do you remember what exactly attacked you?"

"Uh.. I don't remember too much 'cept green tentacles... and leaves... some roaring and fangs.. that's 'bout it." Xigbar sighed as the bandages fell from his lone arm, and he flexed it, moving it around to regain some feeling from the tight bandages. He looked at the deep maroon scar from his shoulder to his elbow, some still healing and covered in a scab, and to his wrist healed bite marks.

"Last bandages... Turn to the left, please..." Vexen gently slid the scissors under the bandages on Xigbar's neck, making sure to cut slowly and carefully; He didn't want to cut the man's jugular vein, let alone make a minor cut. The small amount of bandages were off within a minute, and it revealed yet another long, jagged maroon scar from his missing eye to his neck, some parts still healing like his arm, some fully healed though the shape was there: a long claw mark. Roxas ghosted his finger along the scar, following the path of scars, touching the healed gashes under his new boyfriend's missing eye; Xigbar's tan skin was rough... but the scars were smooth, like glass. Vexen finished quickly, scooping up the used bandages.

"So... How 'xactly am I gonna get to the bathroom and like.. get down in the tub? Can't I teleport?" Xigbar questioned, stretching and sitting up, and Roxas got to his feet so he was standing in front of the sniper.

"I wouldn't suggest teleporting until you're at full strength. Well, Roxas and I can help you walk or carry you.. or if you want, I can also get Demyx or Marluxia to help me. Then sit you in the bath tub, then I'll cut the bandages off and come back when you're done."

"Xigbar's better off with one of them since I'm so short." Roxas said as Xigbar pushed the blankets off his legs, but the blond couldn't see any of the scars from the bandages.

"What about Lex? He's hurt too?"

"A few broken ribs, scratches and cuts, but the main damage was serious burns to his legs. He's on crutches currently, though he'll be off them in a few days." Vexen informed Xigbar as he dropped the bag of bandages into a larger bag on a small metal cart stocked with fresh bandages, utensils, and various tubes of ointments.

"That sucks..." Xigbar frowned; Whatever attacked him only had it's sight on him apparently... It hurt, but he managed to swing his legs over the side of the bed with Roxas' help, hissing under his breath, but his bare, scarred feet hit the cool floor without any problems. "I think I can walk with Roxy's help."

"Xigbar, don't be stubborn. Not only have you not walked in a month, but I had to re-attach one of your legs," Vexen sighed, shaking his head. "Admit it, you need help."

Xigbar scowled. He didn't like to ask help... but he scoffed. He was going to have to bathe sooner or later and with help... so he might as well get it over with.

"Fine... just help me walk." Xigbar mumbled.

"I'll go get Marluxia..." Vexen sighed, and exited the room, not bothering to pull down his rolled up cloak sleeves.

Roxas smiled and moved closer to Xigbar, kissing the man's scarred forehead gently and holding his broad shoulders. He broke the chaste kiss and laid his forehead against Xigbar's. The affectionate motions felt normal, yet at the same time foreign, and Roxas was almost unsure of himself. He had indeed touched Axel in the same way, but this was different; his motions were truly sincere now. They heard footsteps and broke apart on instinct, then realizing they didn't have to hide anything from Vexen or the others and Roxas had to give a tiny smile; Vexen was right... they could rest. Vexen walked back into the room followed by Marluxia and Demyx, who skipped in with a grin on his face.

"Morning, Roxas and Xigbar!" Demyx greeted the two cheerfully, waving hard. "So.. did you two have sex yet?"

Roxas' face instantly lit up bright red, but Xigbar only had a faint blush that couldn't be seen because of his tan skin, but you could tell from his ears that were tilted down and from their shocked expressions. Demyx was always one to go out and speak his mind...

"No.. we have not..." Roxas mumbled, trying to keep his mind away from any dirty thoughts involving Xigbar... naked... against him... He blushed even harder, resisting hiding his face with his hood.

"Okay..." Demyx giggled.

"So, what did you need our help for?" Marluxia asked, looking over at Xigbar, who had a neutral expression. Marluxia certainly wasn't his most favorite member, but he was strong and could help... Xigbar sighed.

"To help me walk to the bathroom.." Xigbar huffed.

"I can do that.." Marluxia shrugged, moving closer to the bed.

Roxas got next to Xigbar, moving his arm around his boyfriend's waist. Xigbar stood but he groaned, nearly falling over but Marluxia and Roxas caught him. Marluxia got to one side, and Vexen to the other, Xigbar wrapping his arm around Marluxia's shoulder, while Roxas had a hand on his waist to steady him.

"Small steps... We're gonna take those bandages off when you're in the tub." Vexen muttered under his breath. Xigbar gave a hesitant step on bandaged legs, Marluxia and Vexen moving with him. Xigbar huffed as he took another tiring step, legs unused to contact with the floor and walking. His legs began to tingle like they had been asleep, and that was to be expected; it had been a month. There was another step and he almost fell because of a sudden bout of dizziness, and he growled; He felt so useless and weak. He couldn't walk on his own and it just bothered him inside because he didn't like to ask for help, and he was in front of Roxas. He was used to being strong but maybe it was just his pride. He was with Roxas, he didn't have to feel bad about anything, it wasn't his fault. Xigbar was able to manage a few more steps around the side of the bed, and he was halfway to the bathroom then. Roxas felt Xigbar lean on him, but he kept strong as Xigbar made another step. With a sigh, Xigbar had to lean on Marluxia as he made another step. Xigbar groaned as his reattached leg quivered and tingled, and it felt even more strange to move it, like he was just barely in control. Xigbar made it to the bathroom door, and he had to lean on Marluxia and Roxas as Vexen opened the door.

"So... how am I gonna get in the tub?" Xigbar grunted as he limped into the bathroom with help.

"Sit on the edge and then lower yourself in..." Vexen huffed. The four made it to the massive tub, and Xigbar was able to sit himself on the rim of the tub without falling.

"Shit.." Xigbar muttered through gritted teeth as he touched his reattached leg which felt.. detached and it ached. He slid himself into the tub easily, sighing in relief.

"There we go.." Marluxia said, hand on his hip as Demyx peaked into the room.

"You all can go now." Xigbar gave a tired smirk.

"Alright. Let me get the scissors and get those bandages off and then you can bathe." Marluxia and Vexen exited the bathroom but the blond returned with his scissors a few moments later. He bent down on one knee next to the tub, snipping the bandages off Xigbar's thigh first and then moving down towards his ankle. As the bandages slid off, Roxas could see the maroon bite marks, and he bit his lip. He couldn't imagine how horrible and painful it felt to be torn apart like that.. to have teeth stabbing into you and claws tearing through you... He shivered, and Xigbar saw this, frowning. The bandages came off Xigbar's other leg, and Roxas could clearly see the deep scar where the leg had be reattached, and the huge scar that lasted from his ankle to his knee.

"Your legs have healed quite nicely..." Vexen stated as he stood, collecting all the bandages in one hand. He left Xigbar and Roxas alone, closing the door behind him.

"Hey kiddo, do ya wanna take a bath with me?" Xigbar asked, looking over at Roxas, who blushed. He chuckled at that.

"Um.. okay.." Roxas said, blushing harder. First Demyx with asking if they had sex and then Xigbar asking him to bathe with him... naked... He was hesitant. He had never been naked in front of anyone before... but he didn't have anything to fear. Xigbar loved him and he loved Xigbar, and he wanted them to make love so they were going to see each other nude eventually. He exhaled and he unzipped his cloak, letting the article of clothing fall off his shoulders and pool on the tile floor. His boots and socks came off, and Xigbar looked away to make Roxas feel more comfortable, deciding to busy himself with taking his boxers off slowly. He tossed them over the side of the tub as Roxas pulled his black leather pants and boxers off. Xigbar held his arm out to Roxas, who took it, stepping into the tub and resting between Xigbar's legs on his knees. Xigbar gave a soft smirk as he touched Roxas' shoulder, the boy flinching subconsciously through his blush. The little blond was tense but Xigbar understood. It felt strange even to him, to be so close to someone, naked. Roxas turned slightly and twisted the knob on the wall to turn the water on, cold water rushing into the tub. Both of them shivered, but Roxas turned the knob towards the red dot which signaled hot, and Xigbar gave a laugh.

"You don't gotta be embarrassed 'round me, Roxas..." Xigbar said as the water filled the tub up to his waist, and Roxas' thighs. He stroked Roxas' cheek lovingly, and the latter looked up with those beautiful blue orbs that stared into his soul. His hand found it's way to Roxas' back, and the blond leaned into it, but Xigbar pulled him towards his chest. Roxas' blush arose again as his cheek rested against Xigbar's strong, scarred chest, breathing as he got more relaxed and snuggled against Xigbar, who grinned. Xigbar turned the water off, and it felt wonderful to be in the hot water... but even better to have Roxas against him. He could feel the soft, supple skin as he rubbed Roxas' back, fingers trailing down his boyfriend's neck, down the curve of his back, but not going near his buttocks, instead just going back up to make gentle circles on his shoulder.

Roxas was tracing each of his scars with a faint touch, and he wanted to kiss the boy of light. He tilted Roxas chin up, and the boy raised up to be level with Xigbar, who kissed Roxas with scarred lips. Roxas gave a soft mewl as Xigbar's tongue vied for entrance and he obeyed as he wrapped his arm's around the man's neck, groaning into his mouth when his privates rubbed against Xigbar's stomach. Their kiss was slow, and full of longing. He almost wanted to make love right now but... they just got together.. it would be too soon. Roxas moaned as Xigbar pressed kisses to his neck, warm tongue sliding up and down his neck.

"Mmm, Xigbar. A-ah.." Roxas found himself kissing Xigbar's neck frantically, almost forgetting the reason they were in the tub. He reluctantly pulled away from Xigbar, who raised a curious eyebrow at the blond. He grabbed the bar of soap from a basket without holes on the tub's rim, noticing that it held soap, shampoo, conditioner, and other bottles. "Remember?"

"Alright, kiddo.." Xigbar gave a chuckle, sneaking in a kiss.

"Of course, Xigbar..." Roxas said softly, dipping the soap in the comfortably hot water and he began to lather the soap up. Xigbar didn't mind when Roxas' hand began to scrub his chest gently, leaving a trail of white bubbles. He tilted his head to allow Roxas access to his neck. He took the soap from Roxas, choosing to press the bar against the boy's back and rub it in gently to wash the boy's back. Roxas' hand ran against the shoulder of his missing arm and he involuntarily quivered, a jolt of strange feeling flowing through him; It felt like needles of ice just barely poked him.

"I'm sorry." Roxas found the words falling from his mouth before he could stop them, withdrawing his hand from Xigbar's shoulder.

"It's fine..." Xigbar said, looking at his tingling shoulder then at Roxas. "It just felt.. kinda weird, kid. I'm cool."

"Are you sure?" Roxas asked, inhaling sharply when Xigbar trailed the soap down the soft curve of his back. He gulped slightly when Xigbar moved away from his butt again. "You.. You can touch me there."

"Yeah.." Xigbar gave a chuckle."Are _you _sure?"

Roxas could help but smile at Xigbar's concern."Yeah."

Roxas watched as Xigbar handed him the soap. He shivered as Xigbar's hand trailed down his back, moaning softly as only the man's finger tips caressed his back. They stopped just above his butt, and he urged Xigbar to go down further with a nudge to his side. Roxas took a second to move so that he was resting in Xigbar's lap, legs around the man's waist. He gave a quiet squeak and quivered as his boyfriend's hand touched his ass, the latter using wet fingers to gently massage the soft flesh. Soft kisses were trailed up his neck, and Xigbar's entire upper body pressed against his chest and stomach, and his head lay on Xigbar's shoulder. He could feel his cock harden, but he tried to ignore it. Xigbar watched with great vigilance as he trailed his hand down Roxas' thigh, making tiny circles before just letting his hand rest in place.

"I love ya, Roxas," Xigbar whispered in Roxas' ear, warm breath washing over the shell of his beloved blond's ear lovingly.

"I love you too, Xigbar," Roxas whispered back, running the soap along Xigbar's shoulder blades, sliding his fingers through Xigbar's wet ponytail. He placed the soap on the rim of the tub before he found the blue tie that held Xigbar's hair; It was gone in a second, along with Xigbar's eyepatch, in two swift motions. He watched Xigbar's dual toned hair fan out, hiding his stronger back, and it floated gently in the cooling water, and Roxas had to sigh at how beautiful and silky the man's hair was. Xigbar didn't make a sound as he turned the water back on so more hot water could fill the deep tub that nearly came up to his shoulders. Roxas leaned back, cupping his hands and taking a handful of water, pouring it on Xigbar's head. His boyfriend coughed and laughed at the same time, and he couldn't help laughing as he took the shampoo bottle in hand, popping the top and squeezing some into the palm of his hand. The water was turned off as he put his hands on Xigbar's head, beginning to scrub gently; Xigbar took the chance to press a kiss to Roxas' neck as the boy washed his hair. He could wash himself, but he didn't mind that Roxas was doing it, the boy's touches were so soothing...

Roxas noticed that Xigbar seemed like he was asleep, the man's eye closed and his face was pressed against his neck. He stopped, staring at the hole where Xigbar's left eye had been, staring at the burn like marks around the open crevice and the scar tissue that had collected inside. He put the bottle down and scooped up a handful of water, releasing it over Xigbar's head to wash away the bubbles.

"Keep your eye closed..." Roxas said as he placed his hand over Xigbar's missing eye to prevent anything getting in, while the water and soap ran down his face. He decided to take the other three bottles from the basket, setting them on the rim before he dipped it in the water and let it fill. He poured the water over Xigbar's hair, hand still over the eye hole. Xigbar spit water out, and rose up. He grabbed a towel that rested on the toilet, wiping his face off before tossing it back onto the toilet. Xigbar grinned softly at Roxas, kissing the boy's soft, warm lips. Roxas didn't mind when Xigbar wet his hair using the basket, or when he felt shampoo squirted onto his spiky blond locks. As strong fingers scrubbed his hair, he sighed with contentment, not wanting this moment to end. He felt like they were in a state of euphoria; they didn't have to be afraid, or worried... It was just he and Xigbar.

Xigbar wished that Xemnas wasn't such an ass and that they weren't being hunted down, so that they could all be free and Roxas wouldn't be worried... and moments like these could last forever. Where they could just lay together and kiss without fearing for their lives.. but that wouldn't happen until Xemnas was gone.


End file.
